Where Light Always Comes Back
by JJackson29
Summary: Houtarou finds a place where light always awaits even through gray days. As time goes by, he realizes of his world changing with every choice he makes. Every turn always takes him back to one place, one moment, one person. AU: The Classics Club did not happen, yet the fates of our characters clash together in early adulthood.
1. Trace of a Gentle Breeze

...

Mid-October sunlight felt nostalgic for a reason I could not find.

For another unknown reason, I was wandering near Yokohama Bay, not sure at which exact point. I rarely ever visited a beach, so I thought that taking a quick look at the ocean wouldn't mind me before I left the city.

However, this spontaneous trace of enthusiasm started to dispel away at the sight of a few fishermen that hadn't seemed so bothersome until I actually approached the limits of the road and realized they were old, loud and judging by the multiple bottles of alcohol, probably drunk and territorial.

Before giving up the idea in all its entirety, my eye was caught by a cliff just above the sharp rocks that limited the colliding waves. It went pretty high up from the beach, but from where I was, an about thirty-meter long slope was an easy shortcut.

Needing to reinstate my head, I let a wooded pathway lead me to an almost completely hidden, old lighthouse. The place was clear of any activity, isolated and quiet, qualities that motivated me to sneak inside and enjoy a brief moment of solitude. I could imagine myself running off to this place whenever the city became especially loud and stressful, if it wasn't so off-ways for me.

I made my way to the entrance, where a door, or any kind of restriction, was missing. Different from other lighthouses that worked as actual homes, this one was not tall nor wide enough, meaning it once had a single, simple purpose.

I stepped inside and the first I noticed was a spiral staircase that took hold of half the space. The bricks on the walls had lost most of the white paint that had once covered them. The layer of blue paint on the rungs was almost gone, revealing the rusty metal underneath. A red pole in the middle of the room suffered from the same lack of maintenance. The place had grown, not just old, but forgotten.

As I climbed up each step, a thin echo followed my pace. The path had been obscured by the malicious bindweeds clinging onto every single window. The only beams of dim light came from a half-opened doorway at the end of the staircase.

The closer I got, the clearer the sound of the waves was.

I reached the half arch of light at the door of the room beneath the top of the tower. As expected, the center of this room was occupied by the metallic base of the lantern. Keeping up an easy pace, I continued moving upstairs. There was no door to the light room, just a cement frame.

As soon as I stepped onto the last rung, I dived into the aureate sunlight coming from the deck. The refreshing air merged with the light into a subtle warmness. Mesmerized by an unrealistic golden sunset reflecting upon the sea, I ran my fingers over the corroded railing as I made my way around the immense, vane lantern.

I turned my gaze, and then I saw her. As if taken out from the same idealistic book as the sunset.

She was young, with clear silken skin and long raven-black hair. Leaning over the railing, letting the glinting breeze stroke her mild face as her hair waved gracefully along with the air. A long-sleeve violet dress detailed her delicate figure, remarking a natural elegance that contrasted with this torn place.

As if I had irrupted into somebody else's privacy, a slight gasp cut into my silence. Slowly, she turned around in awe. I was more puzzled at the fact that she hadn't noticed my presence earlier.

The dainty face that fit into her ladylikeness soon changed the puzzlement expression into an amiable smile limited by the rosy blush on each side. And her eyes… something in her eyes was… hard to explain. They were larger than any other person's I knew, but they also had a peculiar deepness. They glimmered in expression, at an almost overwhelmingly energetic point for me. For the few seconds they held onto mine, it felt as if they could see right through me.

She then bowed her head as to what seemed a sign of exculpation, walked past me and left the tower.

I broke out of my unconscious gawking the moment she disappeared. I shrugged it off since, heading to a party, I was about to be forced into socialization anyways. My search for uninterrupted peacefulness had been unsuccessful, so I took one last look at the sea before abandoning the lighthouse, which I didn't believe I would go back to.

…

It was the start of autumn when I received a call from Ibara Mayaka, the shortest, most underestimated as harmless, nemesis anyone could have. She didn't seem to care in the least about disturbing my holy weekend.

"I'm gathering my closest friends only, and you, to celebrate. Be grateful I'm asking you to come." She said through the line. "Oh, and before you try to make up any excuses, I already talked to Tomoe-chan. _You can't escape._ " She threatened and hung up.

Mayaka was celebrating the publication of her first magazine as Art Director of the Edition Staff in an important publishing house. After working her way hard, she had finally accomplished to become part of the makers of a popular magazine throughout the metropolitan area of Japan.

This was an important achievement for her, but even so, she did not want to turn this into a huge deal. Therefore, she had planned on toasting only with very few friends. Although, it hadn't initially been her idea; it was Satoshi the one to convince her.

A day or two after Mayaka's call, I received one from him. My very old friend had come up with a surprise for her and wanted me to be aware and not ruin it. He explained that the plan was to gather more than just a couple of friends at the restaurant Mayaka had chosen. The two of them would arrive later than the guests and we would all surprise her.

Even if my sister, Mayaka and Satoshi had forced me to go, I wasn't planning on avoiding the occasion; that and the fact that I didn't have much of a choice.

As to my sister, she had had trouble while traveling and got detained in the Japanese Consulate in Kenya. I was almost sure she wasn't a delinquent, but I couldn't guess why they'd retain her. Too sad for Mayaka and Satoshi, Tomoe couldn't make it to her party or even apologize over the phone.

…

After the odd experience at the lighthouse in Yokohama Bay, I found my way back to Tokyo via _shinkansen_ , and arrived to the dining room fairly on time since Satoshi and Mayaka were just on their way to the restaurant.

The dining room was big enough to hold the other twenty people comfortably, and everyone seemed happy to be part of the moment.

A few minutes later, Mayaka stepped inside the room with Satoshi covering her eyes with his hands. She seemed confused for the way she kept asking what he was doing. Satoshi could be cheeky, and with the night being a cheesy occasion, he had lost all sense of shyness. He leaned over to Mayaka's ear, whispered something that made her blush, and finally unveiled the surprise. Before she could yell in embarrassment at to whatever he had said, her eyes opened wide at the amount of people waiting for her.

Victim of confusion, incredulity, happiness and excitement all at the same time, Mayaka was received by a horde of congratulations and great wishes.

Little after that, Satoshi saw me and walked up to my table, which was apparently theirs too.

"Long time no see!" He chirped throwing his arm over my shoulders, rubbing his cheek against mine.

Irritation wouldn't have shown up in my eyes but I couldn't help but to be annoyed by his overly affectionate greeting.

"I can see you missed me." He smirked. While I'd usually describe him as very cheerful and a quite bold person, I would still not call him entirely human for several reasons.

"You have serious issues with shame." I said as I pushed him away before going back to my neutral mood.

"So? Isn't this amazing? I just hope Maya enjoys herself instead of worrying about details." A gleeful tone printed on his words. Satoshi was well-known for his exaggerated expressions, but this one was genuine. "Anyways, what took you so long?"

Before I could answer to his question, avoiding telling the complete truth of course, his cellphone started ringing.

"Hey! I was waiting for your call." He said covering his mouth and the speaker. "Eh? You're here? Okay, I'll meet you outside." He hung up with a wide smile.

"Houtarou, can you distract her for a minute?"

"What do you mean?"

"Just go over to her, keep her looking this way, okay?" He could barely keep the excitement from reflecting on his eyes.

I agreed and did as I'd been told while he slipped through the tables to get outside. When Mayaka saw me, her smile went away and she sneered, but then smiled again.

"I'm kidding, Houtarou. I'm actually glad you made it." She said simple-heartedly, but as though she couldn't believe her own words.

"Congratulations on your new job." I gave her the same tone, wondering how long this friendly exchange would last.

"Thanks, thanks." She waved her hands with modesty. "I asked Fuku-chan not to be so excited about it since this was just my first assignment, but I guess he couldn't keep it down."

"You know how he is. But I think he has his fair reasons. Just enjoy yourself and let him know it was worth it."

Her mild smile lasted a few seconds before she hit me on the shoulder with her tiny fist.

"Stop it. I don't like cheesy talks coming from you." She frowned.

"You made me come all the way here only to mistreat me?" I rubbed my poor shoulder.

"Like you had anything better to-" Her malicious speech was interrupted by Satoshi's hand patting her on the shoulder.

"Guess who's here?" He stepped aside, clearing the way.

The moment she crossed the wooden frame of the entrance, Mayaka immediately gasped before jumping in for a tight hug as she screamed "Chi-chan!" Her voice didn't have the sharp tone it normally would, but one full of joy and surprise that she rarely ever showed.

The other person didn't get to say something and simply held Mayaka the same tender way.

As for me, I was almost sure of having recognized the violet dress, black hair and white skin. It was not until she pulled back and opened her eyes that it hit me.

…

We went back to our table, which unsurprisingly, was also reserved for Mayaka's friend. Both girls had a small talk full of sweet words and uncontainable smiles before the hostess had to leave and be greeted by many others.

Right when she got up the table, her friend turned her gaze towards Satoshi and me.

"I am very sorry for the delay, Fukube-san." Her voice was soft and grieved. "I had to go back to Yokohama in very short notice."

"No problem at all, Chitanda-san. Actually, I think it had a special impact on Maya." He spoke still lightheartedly.

Satoshi left shortly after Mayaka gestured him from across the room, leaving Chitanda and I alone. The place wasn't quiet, but the silence between us was noticeable. Although quietness had never been a problem to me, it could turn easily into awkwardness at a situation like ours.

I tried not to look directly at her and call her attention, but I could feel her gaze focusing on me as if trying hard to prove I was someone. Then she talked in a low voice, more to herself but still loud enough for me to hear.

"Have we not met before?" She asked curiously.

I did not know how to respond as I wasn't sure the question was directed to me. A coincidence this big was unsettling, but so was her sudden curiosity. Just as I stared, now directly, at her in confusion, Mayaka reappeared behind her back.

"Houtarou? Are you sure, Chi-chan? He's never been in Yokohama…"

Then, as if she had not expected anyone to overhear her question, Chitanda's cheeks flushed immediately. Hers was a somewhat suspicious reaction, yet I could not make out exactly how.

"Not exactly, but I believe I have seen your friend somewhere." She responded with a hesitating voice and a smile.

"Is that so? Where?" Mayaka tilted her head in confusion and stared at me as if she had heard the weirdest of phenomena.

"Um… somewhere in Yokohama." As she finished her sentence, Chitanda looked nervously at me for less than a second.

I suspected she, like me, was trying to avoid any misunderstandings by hiding the detailed story of how we had seen each other before. I thanked for that since I didn't want to be questioned either, but it was much too late.

"Yokohama?!" Mayaka's expression turned from incredulity to impeachment. Her eyes opened wide and I could sense the imminent. "How did you end up in Yokohama?!"

As if her upcoming lecture wasn't enough to make me want to suffocate myself in advance, Satoshi came out of nowhere, and ignoring the tense atmosphere, decided it was the perfect moment to meddle and make things even worse.

"You were in Yokohama? Is that why you were late?"

"He was late? You must've fallen asleep on the train to miss the way! Your laziness has no boundaries, does it?!" Mayaka's bad temper just went higher. Good thing the other tables were loud enough to not pay attention to us.

I could no longer stand the unjustified reaction and I was about to raise my voice and stop it. However, Chitanda intervened sheepishly.

"Do not be too harsh on him, I probably committed a mistake." She instantly calmed her down with just her voice. "You said it yourself, Maya-san, if he is never been to Yokohama, the person I saw probably just looked similar."

"Chi-chan, you don't know him the way we do. This is something he could definitely do." Mayaka retorted with a lower voice.

"Chitanda-san is right. Even if it happened, Houtarou still made it. Let's give him the benefit of the doubt and keep enjoying the party." Satoshi interfered.

Still, for the sake of my remaining pride, I had to defend myself. Besides, Chitanda's reddened face looked like a sign of unnecessary guilt, and if this kept going, I feared she'd feel forced to tell the story. With this being enough, I stood up.

"I took the wrong train." The three of them turned their attention towards me. "At the intersection in Otsuki, I got on the subway line to Yokohama by mistake. It must've been because I felt so light-headed." While they were all listening to my explanation, I raised my glance and directed it towards Chitanda. "Maybe you-" Right, manners. "Chitanda-san saw me while I was walking out of the station."

Confused and surprised by my answer, she nodded gently in agreement. I thought we both had chosen not to tell the actual story of our previous encounter to avoid further misunderstandings; either that or I had indeed convinced her that I was someone else.

"Ah…" Mayaka sighed heavily after a short silence. "… It's so pathetic that I'll believe it happened to Houtarou." A calmed smile reappeared on her face when she turned back to Chitanda. "By the way, I haven't introduced you two."

At her words, Chitanda stood up instantly as Mayaka held her shoulders.

"Houtarou, her name is Chitanda Eru. I met her during junior year in college." She said at the other side of the table, uncommonly endearingly.

Before she introduced me, Satoshi found his way to get into the conversation and do it himself from my side.

"Chitanda-san, this is Oreki Houtarou. Maya and I have known him since middle school!"

"It is a pleasure, Oreki-san. Please forgive the misconception I just caused."

I stood straight when I saw her bowing with such formality at a perfect angle and speed. Judging for her manners, she could be the absolute portrait of a lady. I greeted her back but not with the same grace, only with my nervous head down.

"… N-Not a problem."

After we were introduced, a small talk on their friendship followed. They mentioned how they met at a seminary, how Mayaka had gotten lost in the auditorium and Chitanda, who was attending a different lecture, had helped her find the right room. From then on they grew fond of one another but had lost contact when Mayaka moved to Tokyo.

…

After our plates were finished, drinks were the only companions of people's conversations. Since Mayaka and Chitanda had acquaintances in common, they did not stay long at the table.

Satoshi took advantage of this time to start a conversation on Chitanda.

"Isn't it interesting? She's from Kamiyama too. If you had stayed there, you probably would have known her for as long as you've known Maya and me."

 _«Chitanda Eru_. » She did have an unusual name, if I had heard of her before, I would have remembered it.

"Is she famous or something?" I asked indifferently.

He seemed offended at my question, but quickly went back to his grin.

"The clan is, especially in Kamiyama. Her family possesses gigantic farmlands there and a couple of acres across other prefectures. They provide cereals, fruits and vegetables to some cities in Gifu, Aichi, Nagano, Yamanashi and Kanagawa." He talked as he counted names with his hand.

I would never expect less trivial information from him. Her position explained why she looked too sophisticated to be in an abandoned rusty lighthouse.

"And she's pretty too, huh?" He poked my ribs with his elbow.

"And you're the one with a girlfriend." I gave him a cold tone of irritation.

"I meant that you need to move on. Morishita-chan is too proud to take you back. Might as well work out with Chitanda-san, you know, because of the whole _opposites attract_ theory."

I chose to take his words for a joke. "You're not serious, are you?"

"Of course I'm kidding. I didn't mean any of that." His laughter washed off his words, but it left me thinking.

Morishita Mirai was a lawyer whom I had met years earlier and somehow ended frequenting later on. Given my personality and actions, I didn't pay much attention to what she took as a much more serious relationship. In the end it didn't work.

The cause was not me not liking her, because she was intelligent and quite pretty. The problem, as she had put it, was that she had allowed herself to develop deeper feelings for me that what I could ever reciprocate. Morishita was good at studying people's minds. Therefore, as cold as it sounds, I could not promise to fall for her the way she had for me.

We never spent too much time together as what anyone would call a couple, it hadn't been three months by the time she confessed what she confessed, but I knew I could never reach her pace. And since I was not being fair to her, we stopped seeing each other. Three months later, here I was, remembering it until Satoshi cut into my thoughts.

He got up and I followed. At the lack of something to read, the proper environment and a less social friend, I found myself forced to leave my seat more than once after that. I never chose so, but at least I knew a few people, just enough to avoid unnecessary introductions throughout the night.

…

When the night was almost over and everyone started to leave, Mayaka and Satoshi were too busy dismissing people, yet she gave herself a moment to take her friend to our table. They walked up to me holding onto each other's arm.

Mayaka left us alone after making sure everything would be fine. Although, to me, it was more of an " _it better be._ "

Chitanda gave herself the permission to sit just one seat away from me. It was by this time that I paid attention to the way she sat without losing posture; shoulders back, hands on lap, head up and straight back. A lady through and through.

"I've heard you are from Kamiyama City, too, Oreki-san." She smiled warmly but somewhat shyly.

Even when she was acting kindly, trying to be friendly to someone who just a few hours ago had been a complete stranger to her, it was still a bit confusing. I nodded.

"I am, but I haven't been there since I was a kid."

"Oh, I see." She glanced down to her hands, and then, with the same shyness but now accompanied by curiosity, she finally brought up the previously avoided topic. "… Oreki-san, may I ask… How did you find the lighthouse?"

She changed her expression into a more serious one, but her eyes still shone with penetrating energy.

I didn't know how to answer her sudden inquiry. She kept on.

"Well, I understand you were lost, but you decided to not mention it."

"It was easier than discussing a coincidence no one can really explain."

My answer left her pondering with the same expression, but with the little I knew about her, I was not sure if that meant she would stop talking.

We stayed at the table quietly as the room emptied progressively. The strange part was that Chitanda said she knew I was lost, but she did not give a reason for her being on an isolated cliff.

By the time the restaurant was about to close, everybody but Mayaka, Satoshi, Chitanda and I, were gone. While we were having separate conversations, Mayaka suddenly remembered something regarding me.

"Now that you mention it, Houtarou is an accountant. Right, Houtarou? Weren't you looking for a new job?" She took me out of my sort of talk with a drunken Satoshi.

"Is that so? We are actually in the hiring season. Are you interested, Oreki-san?"

 _Wait, I never said I was looking for a job._

"Eh? Well, I already have a settled job."

"Oh, I understand." She smiled. "However, if you happen to feel curious about it, do not hesitate on contacting us for an interview. Or if you know of someone interested, feel free to address them with us."

She took a small card out of her purse and handed it to me. The moment I saw the card I was about to say something to avoid it, but then I looked up. Huge mistake.

The same thing that had happened at the lighthouse happened again. Her big eyes trapped mine and left me off-guard. When I blinked out of whatever feeling that gave me, I was holding a white and purple business card with her name on it. "Chitanda Eru - Deputy Director General."

According to Satoshi's data, Chitanda was as old as the rest of us.

" _Deputy Director?_ At 24?" I unintentionally asked out loud.

"It is a _family_ business." Mayaka rolled up her eyes. "We could talk about that, but I think Chi-chan is tired." Chitanda, blushing, simply smiled. "Okay, let's go."

At her call, we all walked out of the place. Apparently, I was staying at Satoshi's house while Chitanda at Mayaka's. We took a taxi and the first stop was Satoshi's. I was perfectly sober, but sake had quite a strong effect on him, so it was up to me to carry him into the building.

Once we got to his apartment, we said our goodbyes. He kept calling out "Bye-bye, girls!" and waving erratically his hands.

As Mayaka covered her face in embarrassment and the taxi drove away, I was left with a half-awaken, half-asleep Satoshi hanging from my shoulders. That night I was not his guest, but more like his babysitter.

The next morning I did not stay long, I preferred to avoid a moody post-hangover Satoshi. I prepared some coffee before heading to the train station and left him a whole pot to help get over the sickness.

When I went back to my house in Kofu, I found a letter on the coffee table. The margins had red and blue lines, which meant it was international mail, which could only mean that it was from my sister. I walked up to my room to read what Tomoe had to say.

She started by telling me that she was still in Kenya but heading to Egypt soon. The explanation she gave as to why she'd stayed in the Japanese Consulate read:

«You think your sister can be easily robbed? Ha! »

 _So you still alive, huh?_ Being my sister, I wasn't surprised. A lot of peculiar things often happened to and with her.

Besides that, she sent me her regards and said she'd call when arriving to Egypt.

After finishing her letter, I grabbed the envelope and put the folded page back inside. I took out my wallet and cellphone and placed them beside the letter on the desktop. A piece of paper was sticking out of the wallet. It was Chitanda's business card.

I remembered her offer and started to think of how troublesome it would be for me to take a job in Yokohama. That, if I ever were to need one there. In Kofu, my job was twenty minutes away using the subway. I didn't want to give up that convenience. I tossed the business card inside a drawer and went back downstairs.

...


	2. Much Too Fast

I can't let you read this without begging for your pardon first :( ! School was tougher than expected hehe and this chapter was so hard to downsize because it's only a transition. Anyways, I hope it's not too hasty because I don't want to give you something not worth reading :)

Thanks for following the story, and sorry but this and the following chapter are gonna be longer than usual and kind of fast haha you'll see ^_^

...

Not too sure if I should have said something or not, I still did not retire my gaze from her now approaching silhouette. She had an elegant smile on her face although focusing her eyes as if trying to convince herself it was indeed me. Hers wasn't an unpleased reaction, but the polite disbelief of a surprise.

"Oreki-san?" She almost mumbled as she slowed down her last steps towards me.

"Ch-Chitanda-san, good afternoon." Somewhat taken aback, I stuttered.

Her lips soon curved into a wider grin.

"It is a pleasure to see you here." She said in an overly kind manner. "Thank you for taking the time to consider our company."

And then, after I had for two months lived in the convincement of surely never having to meet her so soon, Chitanda bowed at a perfectly acute angle, holding her pale rose coat around her waist.

This resulted the most strange since it had to be me the one bowing with such formality at whom, as soon as I signed the contract, would turn into my superior.

Whilst returning the polite gesture in the most awkward way, I kept asking myself how had things taken this road.

Thinking back of the unfairly short interlude between Mayaka's party and the moment Chitanda came across my way, I realized of what can be brought with time truly being something unpredictable. And it all had started by early November.

…

Throughout October, Oosaki Tarou, the old owner of the bank I was working for, had gone through some financial struggle with his investors. This should have been obvious to anyone working there since the actions charts that were displayed daily became suddenly unsteady. But it hadn't been nothing us staff worried too much about since it had happened before and always went back to normality in matter of weeks. Until November arrived.

It turned out that said problems had been exhausting Oosaki for several months over and his health was worsening with the issue. And so, out of a senile mind and body, he came to a definitive realization. At his eighty-six, no longer having the energy to take care of Oosaki Banking Corporation of Yamanashi, he decided to give it up before, sooner or later, taking it into bankrupt.

It didn't take long for a private bank to purchase all three branches in the prefecture. All actions were sold, all accounts in our registry were transferred to the new owners or a different bank, and the personnel was downsized by sixty percent. Those staff cutouts started at the bottom; janitors, secretaries, messengers, accountants, were withdrawn from the company. Only the highest positions obtained a new contract and unaffected benefits.

As of the matter from the personnel's point of view, it was more than a misfortune. Our three last weeks there were hellish since we had to bring everything to an enclosure so that the new workers could start off fresh.

On a Friday noon, while I enjoyed a hot cup of black coffee at my desk during our only break, I overheard some of my coworkers gathered in a semicircle, complaining about times being difficult.

"What about you, Oreki-kun?" One of them included me. "You always get things done rather quickly, why haven't you switched banks by now?"

Not him, but his statement, irked my gut since times like these challenged my dearest working motto and there was no way for me to shrug off the problem and move on with a quick solution.

With little effort and no interest on building up a detailed response, I spoke simply. "Oosaki-san's decision was so blunt, even if I hurry, it's not upon me to find a job as quickly as it could've been if we had been warned ahead of time."

"You're struggling too, huh?" He pushed back heavily against his chair as he sighed in an empathetic manner.

It seemed as if the blame fell over Oosaki, however, rumors told that he'd had an original plan, but the purchasers had refused to wait beyond three weeks before bringing in their people. And so, three weeks into November, the bank was clear and a bunch of us jobless

Like those guys, I too had dropped some applications here and there by mid-November. But no such luck had crossed my way, or theirs.

…

Talking of misfortune, on November's last Saturday, Satoshi decided to call at around noon. Thinking it could be a company responding to my job application, I picked up the phone, only to hear the blatant tone in his voice and a lot of background noise.

" _Houtarou! Mind a visit?"_

"Satoshi? What are you talking about?"

" _We'll be there at around… two!"_

" _Open your eyes already, Houtarou!"_ I heard Mayaka in the back.

"Hey, I wasn't-"

" _Okay, see ya!"_

Dial tone.

Assuming receiving them was no longer a choice, plus I didn't have anything else to do, I continued to wait for any responses to my job applications. Yet, nothing happened during the three following hours.

…

My compulsory guests arrived as warned and their only reasoning as to why they decided to break into my peaceful home was because _« I felt like taking a couple of holidays I've been saving up. So why not granting you, my lonesome friend, with some quality time? »_ According to Satoshi's boldness.

Whether I considered my spare time a vacation or not, both of us were free for the time being. However, while I had chosen peace at home, he and Mayaka had decided to disturb my weekend. They were on their way to Osaka, in the meantime, I had to bear them as the host until they left at night to arrive to their destination in the morning.

I offered them drinks in hopes that they would prepare them themselves, but I ended up in the kitchen brewing barley tea for everyone. Once I finished pouring it into three cups, I took them to the coffee table in the living room, where they were both waiting.

"Weren't you just promoted?" I referred to Mayaka.

"Yeah, that's why I have to attend a three-day workshop over there." She said before sipping the tea.

"And you?" I looked at Satoshi.

"I heard that Honobu Yonezawa might be there at the moment, interviewing him is a good excuse to extend my holiday." He retorted.

"So you're both on a work trip, not a holiday."

"Well, fifty-fifty." He shifted his head to one side.

For a moment everything went quiet, but having nothing more to say, I didn't mind. Then I realized that they were both looking at me, then each other, then back at me.

"What is it?" I put down my cup, suspicious of their intentions.

Mayaka opened her eyes wider, as if insisting on Satoshi to speak up while she kept her cup under her nose.

"I was reading the newspaper the other day… Did Oosaki-san really sell the company?" He made a grimace as if stepping on quivery ground.

"How did you know?" I frowned confused but unaffected.

"There was an article in the business section talking of an international bank chain predominating in Kofu after buying other banks in the area. Oosaki was part of the list." He explained.

Perhaps it had just slipped my sight, because I always read the newspapers in the morning, but I hadn't paid much attention to the rest of the pages since I kept checking the now-hiring section.

"Well, he did."

Seeing my calm expression, Mayaka went directly to the core of their interest.

"So what's your plan?"

I breathed deeply before deciding on how to put it so they wouldn't turn the topic into the main point, it was already giving me a headache.

"That's the unpleasant part of it." I stretched my arm and scratched the back of my neck. "I can't get too ahead of myself. I'm applying for three banks downtown; but so far that's pretty much it."

"I guess you'd rather take it your way and save your precious energy." Satoshi mocked.

"I wish I could relax back and take my time." I saw Mayaka roll up her eyes and Satoshi chuckle as I sighed in pain. "But Tomoe's been trying to get Dad to quit his job or at least work a single shift. I can't be a free loader right now."

"Ah… your dad still works until late? That's why he isn't home yet." Satoshi concluded.

"But, about the applications, you haven't gotten a response yet?" Mayaka threw us back to the point.

"It's still early." I excused myself, even when knowing that a week had already passed.

As if thinking was the order of the day, everyone went quiet again, until Satoshi talked.

"This late into the year, it might get especially tough, won't it?" He sounded rather apologetic more than witty.

I slithered my gaze away. "Who knows?"

"Well, you can't blame them for holding hiring seasons." Mayaka added in her usual just tone. "That shouldn't stop you, though. There has to be somewhere where there's vacancy."

"Unless there's a bank with extended seasons this year." Satoshi kept on.

"Extended?" I asked since I hadn't heard of that possibility.

"It's actually happening with the Chitandas." Mayaka replied. "Chi-chan was talking about some changes going on this year, so they had to re-open their season until the end of December."

Satoshi's eyes simultaneously lit up with an idea.

"That's just perfect!" He chirped and came sit down next to me. "That way you wouldn't have to wait for a spot to be released and just present yourself with a convincing resume." He flooded with inspiration as if his words were full of sense. "Even Maya could put in a nice word in for you!"

She raised an eyebrow in discomfort, but then relaxed her expression while stirring her tea with a little spoon.

"I do think you're trustworthy." She said nonchalantly before bringing her cup up to her mouth.

Satoshi stopped fighting back my attempts to get him off my shoulder and I froze. We both turned to inspect Mayaka's much too simple-hearted attitude.

When she put down her cup and met our blank eyes, her expression went back to usual.

"What?" Her eyes shadowed. "I'm talking of you as a person. Just because I'm friends with Chi-chan doesn't mean I'd convince her to sneak you into her company." She sipped the tea once again but turning away, back to her normal self.

Satoshi laughed at this and went back to me. I resumed my irritation.

"That's ridiculous, Satoshi." I pulled back. "Let it go, it's not such a big deal."

He reached over for his cup at the other side of the table, seemingly letting go of his game.

"Funny how you turned down Chitanda-san's invitation a month ago and now you're waiting for a company to reply." He hissed. "Could that have been a godly warning or an accidental curse?" I could see his mocking smirk behind the rim of his cup.

"Well, since is Oreki Houtarou who we're speaking of, he wouldn't even bother considering a job that's one hour away from his bed." Her malicious voice thrived over my silence.

"Insufferable." I muttered.

As threatened, Mayaka and Satoshi stayed until that day's evening. We had dinner out and I saw them off at the train station.

Walking back home, I wondered if they believed me when I said things so calmly. Part of that was true, but not being sure of what would happen next or even what was happening currently left me with an uneasy feeling of frustration.

…

Even past noon, the air outside was starting to carry along the chill of winter a little sooner than usual. I left home earlier to go downtown and meet people from different banks.

Two of the companies I had applied to, politely rejected me. Things in fact started getting wearying.

Once I came out of the last bank on the list, I took advantage of the trip to drop a letter for my sister in a postal service mailbox. In it, I did not mention a thing about my recent mishaps since the least I needed was her calling one of her weird friends to hire me. Those summertime jobs were in the past of my adolescence.

Once home, I noticed the answering machine had recorded a message from a private number. I let it play while I sat down opening the bill envelopes that had come in the mail. The machine exhaled its beep and the next thing I heard, among static noises and in an inconsistent audio, was Tomoe's loud voice.

 _« Hello, Hou-ta-rou! You must be at work or something, huh? »_ Her cheerful tone pained me a little. _« Sorry, but I can't call later. Um… well the thing is I need that PIN number thing that comes with the phone manual? Something like that… Be a nice brother and look for it for me, okay? I'll call back tomorrow, better have it! Bye-bye! »_

Even before the message was over, I could feel a bugging pressure taking over my eyelids.

 _« Oh! Right, those papers should be in one of your drawers- »_

The corrupted static audio came to a sudden end after her last hurried word.

Wondering what had Tomoe gotten herself into this time and when had she started to use my room as her file cabinet, I decided to look for the manual later after having lunch.

I got off the couch and headed to the kitchen to put some rice in the cooker. Just as I shut the lid of the electric pot, I heard the doorbell ring.

What a surprise, a delivery with red « _Return to Sender »_ stamps all over.

…

Seemingly, visiting my house on the way to Osaka wasn't enough, so they had to do it once more in their return to Tokyo.

For the second time, I found myself pouring hot beverages for three while the food was ready. Due to this turn of events, I had to add more rice to the cooker since both of my friends arrived meaning to eat outside but gave up the idea once I told them I was just about to prepare lunch.

Instead of using the sofa, they took a seat at the kitchen counter. Since one of Satoshi's hobbies was cooking and Mayaka felt somewhat guilty for having me triplicate the amount of food, they voluntarily chose to prepare the meal. With Satoshi preparing the curry and Mayaka chopping ingredients, all that was upon me was to prepare the coffee and check on the rice.

After all, this visit was not too shabby for my taste.

Leaving the stew thicken for a few minutes on the fire, the three of us sat at the dining table in front of the counter.

In a quick jolt, as if remembering something, Satoshi snapped two fingers and pulled out a folded piece of paper from his ever so indispensable drawstring bag. He then handed it over to me before taking a sip of his coffee.

Holding an eyebrow up as he gestured with his hand for me to hurry and unfold the paper, I did. In impeccable handwriting, that couldn't be his, was a list of requirements. Confused, I asked "What's this?"

"We ran into Nana-san, Chitanda-san's secretary, in Osaka." He immediately swallowed the coffee to replay with a smile.

I rolled up my eyes.

"Fuku-chan insisted on asking if she knew what was needed to get an interview." Mayaka spoke in a hue of disagreement, crossing her arms. "Just when will you stop spoiling Houtarou?" She turned to scold him.

"I told you-"

I focused my glance on Satoshi's gleeful face. But even an upset tone and cold stare weren't enough to demolish his natural enthusiasm, he proved. He hacked my speech and proceeded with his data display.

"You can bring or mail those papers to the department of Human Resources." He held up an index. "If you pass that filter, you get a general interview."

"Wait." I tried to interrupt him, but failed.

"And," He spoke louder. "If you make it through that, then they book you a personal interview." Satoshi ended his sentence with a proud grin.

Irritated, I couldn't offer the sort of reward Satoshi was waiting from my words.

"I have it under control, I can find myself a job." I gave up my irritation.

I dropped my hands on top of the table, pushed the chair back and got up. Serving rice into three bowls while Mayaka helped Satoshi with the hot curry, the mood went back to neutral.

Two bites into the food, Satoshi renewed his previous proposal.

"You're already betting on other places, why not this one?" He shrugged.

I swallowed the spicy vegetables of my last bite slowly before giving out an answer but was stopped even before opening my mouth.

"He's still right, Houtarou." This time it was her who didn't let me finish, or even start. "There's really not much to lose, just a bit of effort." Her shoulders shrank as she covered her mouth with a neatly folded napkin.

Satoshi grinned as it wasn't usual for Mayaka to support his babbling unless it was objectively rational.

"At least give it a thought." He said after I went silently back to my plate. "You're already saying _no_ when the first step doesn't even involve you going all the way there." He cheered.

Tired of arguing and too busy trying to enjoy the food, I breathed deeply.

"I guess it won't harm to think about it, if that's the only way to keep your mouths shut." My voice was clear and even, so no hopes were to be given.

Satoshi's eagerness still made him bring out a thumb up in front of me.

"Well, it can't turn out that bad." Mayaka concluded and dug her spoon into the bowl.

"Hmm…"

I doubted myself.

That Wednesday, they didn't stay for as long as they had before and by past four they were already back at the main door. Giving out my goodbyes while they slid their feet into their shoes, I added one last demand.

"Ah, by the way." They turned around as I held the door open. "You can't keep bursting into my house anytime you please. Sometimes I do have other plans."

"Sleeping? It doesn't sound like plans to me." Mayaka's infamous smirk appeared.

"Well, we can't let you die old and lonely, my friend." Satoshi patted me on the shoulder before walking out the door.

"At least warn me next time." I waved once and closed the door when they turned around the corner of the sidewalk.

…

The next day, I began searching through my drawers for Tomoe's requested PIN. Leafing through different documents, a small piece of paper fell and slid to the back of the drawer. There, in a dark corner, was Chitanda Eru's business card. Having had no reason to go back to it, I had quickly forgotten it was there, at least until my friends brought it up.

Lying my attention on what I was doing, I left the card aside and kept taking out papers until, at the bottom of the third drawer I checked, found my sister's phone manual.

Now that the search was over, I picked up every item scattered on the carpet to storage it back in its place. Chitanda's card came across my eyes once again. It may have been the status of my wandering mind, but this time I held the card between two fingers and began to think of what seemed as one of Satoshi's simple jokes.

Perhaps, thinking too deeply of a joke would turn it into a misunderstanding, as he always stated. However, at the lack of a distraction, my mind started to rationalize the whys of seeking for employment in Yokohama sounded so inconvenient.

I could not say I wasn't somewhat desperate after two unsuccessful trials at different places, but I bitterly hoped this frustration to vanish sooner than later. After all, both Mayaka and Satoshi candidly believed Chitanda's to be the opportunity I needed.

Before I dived deeper into this conclusions, I heard the house's phone ring and the only two calls I expected were from either a job interview or my sister. But it was too early to receive her call.

…

About two hours passed between phone calls, the second one coming from Tomoe, the first one coming from my third-option bank. The man on the phone thanked me for my interest, but apologized for not having room for another accountant.

I spent the two following hours to his call looking online or in the newspaper for other companies to visit and apply the next day, even if they weren't banks.

Later I picked up the speaker to hear my sister's muffled voice among static.

I recited the PIN number she asked for and after a quick catch-up on her location, warned that I was going to hang up.

 _« Wait! »_ I heard her and brought the phone back to my ear. _« How's Dad? He quit yet? »_

"No, he hasn't." I knew she wouldn't be happy with such answer.

 _« Well, help me convince him! »_ She demanded, hurting my ear. _« It's easier for you since you're right there! »_

As she spoke loudly, I realized that before, when taking the previous call, I had brought Chitanda's business card with me and left it near the answering machine.

"I'll try." Was my only resolution as I absorbed-mindedly turned around between my fingers the rectangular piece of paper.

Tomoe said goodbye and the corrupted sound stopped when I put the phone back on the base. At that point, hurting my pride, I suppose was when I gave in.

…

On that same week's Friday I wrapped up a copy of every document they asked for in an envelope and addressed it to Yokohama, Kanagawa. To my surprise, I received an answer only four days afterwards.

A man called during late morning, informing me that all the paperwork had been done accordingly and my profile seemed acceptable to apply for a position in their Account and Finance Department.

After three unsuccessful trials, it was hard to comprehend a somewhat positive response to my solicitude. Yet, I had dropped one more application at a local factory as a billing clerk, so reserved myself from thinking too confidently of Chitanda's company. Passing the first filter only meant that I theoretically gathered enough certificates to be considered as an accountant.

The man on the phone notified me of the general interview taking place the next Monday at ten in the morning. Grabbing a pen and paper, I took note on this and also on the directions he gave me so I could get there, since he realized that my address was not in Kanagawa.

And so, three days later, I was traveling to Yokohama.

…

The start of another week arrived and the factory I was waiting to hear from hadn't yet answered me. A billing clerk was not the best position since I would prefer not to fall back to where I'd started. But times weren't the best for me in Kofu, so in the end, I was secretly hoping I wouldn't have to take that job.

I pondered on this as I realized that the train cabin felt especially cold even when it was not empty and winter hadn't officially arrived. I still had an hour to go.

A clear sky was covering Kofu when I left, but the clouds seemed to cluster tighter as time passed and the train kept moving.

I buried my hands in my pockets as I closed my eyes to make the ride less uneasy. Long drives could dizzy me fairly quickly, and sleeping was my only form of relief. However, I could not relax enough to sleep or read the rest of the way.

I had to admit that deep down inside, I was feeling anxious. I couldn't decide whether that anxiety came from investing time and effort into an uncertain and most probably unpromising interview; or if I subconsciously wished my energy not to be used in vain and actually be hired.

I too wondered why Satoshi and Mayaka believed I could make my way into this enterprise as if it were a simple task, and why I had given up the pride that kept me from coming. I could not possibly empty my head even when the way was long and the atmosphere was quiet.

All these holes in my mind took hold of me for quite a long time. Before I knew it, my destination was two stations away, it was a little past nine and my interview was right at ten. Either anxiety or nervousness, I felt as though my thoughts were disorganized, and I didn't like that.

Finally there, I got off the train with a folder and a paperback in my bag. I was not sure of how I would handle Chitanda's people, and I couldn't figure out what would come out of this peculiar investment of effort. But it was much too late to turn around.

…

Thanks to the indications written down on the piece of paper I carried, I found quite easily the building I was heading to. It was not the center of the picture at first sight among other prominent edifices, but if seen individually, it did look quite impressing.

Modern, yet unpretentious, this building had a welcoming façade, quickly reminding me of Chitanda being the owner. It was mostly composed of mirror silver windows that reflected Yokohama's evenly white sky from all angles. It consisted of two main constructions, the first being about five floors taller than the second, connected by a glass aisle that crossed through a vast, lime green garden. And stone walls surrounded the entire property.

Going past my amusement, I was determined to get this done, so I walked through the glass doors of the main entrance. Blindingly luminous and transparent, the central atrium rose until the third floor, and the vast reception welcomed those arriving and dismissed those departing.

Unlike Oosaki's bank, were things moved rather slowly, people here were moving around energetically, some with a phone on their ear, some with a stack of papers in their hands, but everyone addressing something. It wasn't crowded or messy, but it did leave an overwhelming first impression.

I walked up to the receptionist's semi-lunar desk and reported myself for a job interview. She asked for my name and quickly redirected me to the second floor once she had confirmed my appointment.

After she held up a finger pointing at the elevator, I took it and headed to Human Resources. Once the doors opened, I could see the same amount of activity I had at the ground floor.

A woman dressed in a suit and holding a clipboard took the names of anyone attending an interview, marked them and then led us to a separate waiting room filled with black cushioned chairs. She left and, following the order of the rows, I sat down behind the other seven people there.

I lifted my wristwatch and noticed that it was quarter before ten and just four more people had arrived. Once the clock hands marked ten o'clock, the woman from earlier came out of the room in front of us and proceeded to explain the procedure. We would be called in groups of four, with the list being chronologically organized according to the submission of our applications.

The first group was received and lasted forty-five minutes in there. I used this time to appease the lightheadedness left as remaining from the train ride.

"Oreki Houtarou-san." I heard the woman's gentle voice call out my name in the second group.

I walked through the door, bowed to the table of interviewers and sat down on the last spot from right-to-left. There was a total of three people on the table, by their name badges, one was the Hiring Manager, another one the Head of Planning, and the woman in the middle was the Executive Director of Finance herself.

The two on the sides looked pretty ordinary, formal and staid people. However, the woman in the middle, _"Sawakiguchi M_." for her name tag, even when wearing a suit, had a rather eccentric attitude.

Her red hair, up-done at the back but with two braids that framed her face, seemed sloppy. From all three, she was the only one unafraid of sharing a smile, and the jovial tone in her voice made it seemed as if she was trying to make friends instead of evaluating subordinates. She kept fidgeting her feet under the table whenever an answer turned long and boring, and read fast through our applications right before asking her questions.

By the time the Hiring Manager moved onto me, it took me by surprise since I was astonished by that woman's nonchalant behavior. They proceeded to ask the normal questions regarding my experience, purposes and stuff of the like. But towards the end, Sawakiguchi reached me at her own curiosity.

"So, Oreki Houtarou-san" She said holding up my resume before her eyes. "You had been working for Oosaki Tarou's bank in Yamanashi's main branch office, right?" She extended her opened palm towards me.

Obviously taken aback by her irrelevant statement more than a question, the other two interviewers turned to her, as well as the other confused participants.

"… Yes, I had." Somewhat feeling under pressure, I answered.

"Did you resign from his company or where you forced to leave?" She didn't scrutinize the looks of her concerned peers.

"Sawakiguchi-san, that's not-" The Head of Planning begged in a low voice.

In turn, Sawakiguchi looked at her directly in the eye and simply put on an oblivious and childish expression. "I came here to make questions." She finalized the discussion and planted her eyes back on me. Leaning in closer, she keenly waited for a response. "Please be honest."

"… I did not resign." I retorted. "The company's actions were sold and the personnel downsized." Surpassing my own embarrassment, I solidified my voice. "I was withdrawn."

Sawakiguchi seemed pleased at my honesty as her smile became humble. Then, she contently went back to her papers. "Very well, please proceed."

Trying to wash off the mortification from her attitude, the other two interviewers moved on and eventually brought the appointment to an end, dismissing the group to bring in the last one.

The chaperone woman told us that the preliminary results would be posted at one o'clock, kindly inviting us to wait at our own will. I assumed this made sense since the important interviews were the ones personally addressed by the Executive Director herself, after all, she was the potentially future boss.

As a reward for waiting, they gave us access to the building's cafeteria. I accepted the invitation and went back to the ground floor. If I could avoid having to come again just to be discharged, I preferred it that way.

The cafeteria was facing the back of the property, so it had a broad view of the garden. Not really feeling hungry, or choosing not to fill my stomach and worsen the ride back to Kofu, I just took a seat at a table next to a window and pulled out the cheap paperback I had picked up at the train station.

The story itself wasn't a great deal, but it made time go by less noticeably. So, that when I was past halfway through the pages and decided to check my watch, it was already time. I went back and when the elevator doors opened, two guys, who looked younger than me, got off with awfully discouraged expressions, as if they had failed an important test.

"Tomorrow we still have another interview, let's now pray for that one." I overheard while getting onto the lift.

Their reactions did little to affect my neutral mood now that I was growing numb to being rejected. Not that I enjoyed it, but there was nothing I could do about it. Besides, I recalled Sawakiguchi's question, mentioning you had been fired at your previous job significantly decreased your chances of being hired.

I returned to the waiting room from before, and a group of people were already forming a semicircle to read the list. It was an image similar to that of school kids finding out their next year's group, except for the lack of glee adults excelled at.

Three people. The list was a mere plain white screen in the center of the wall holding up three names displayed in black.

 _Kishimoto Ai_

 _Oreki Houtarou_

 _Ito Kazunari_

…

I wanted to fixate on what I saw and verified over and over for at least ten minutes before leaving that place. But my head kept spinning around and I could barely stand, let alone walk from the train station to my house.

Lying on my bed and staring at my white ceiling to have a point of stability, I felt as though I had just rode on a rollercoaster.

Was Sawakiguchi testing me after somewhat ridiculing the reason to losing my job? Were the other two people overcompensating for her bold demeanor? Were the other nine people that incompetent?

I could not decide on which question should take over the vortex of confusion recoiling my nerves.

Later that day I received a verification e-mail and the next a call from the company. They set me up an appointment to meet with Sawakiguchi herself for the personal interview on Monday the following week. That gave me a total of six full days to prepare myself for being complexed deeply by that weird woman.

I knew it was pretentious on my side, but I could not trust Sawakiguchi's judgement to the fullest. I had my suspicions that her quirky image strayed far from her actual professional standards, if so, she would probably take me off-guard and dispel me after satisfying her own madness.

Regardless, I had to endure one, probably last, trip to her domains.

…

Once more, those glass doors received me and this time I was not stopping at the second, but the seventh floor. Every time the metallic doors of the elevator opened at almost each floor, the level of ebullition increased, while I could not say so about my degree of self-confidence. Seeing all those people moving energetically and harmoniously made me question if I would ever see myself as part of them.

But the ride ended, I heard the bell of the elevator stopping and next I was walking towards the main office of the department. Slightly nervous to be enclosed alone with Sawakiguchi, I still did not stop walking on a straight line to her office.

A man, older than me but much more frail-looking, immediately recognized me as the only stranger heading towards Sawakiguchi's office. He verified my name and in a deep yet brittle voice asked me to sit and wait for her. Just like most of the building's main structures, her office's walls were of glass but painted in an opaque white. Outside were lined two waiting sofas, were I sat.

I took in the impression this floor was leaving on me, and the man who'd received me went back to his work. No one else arrived after me and about five minutes before two, the time at which my appointment had been settled, Sawakiguchi popped out of her office, leaving the door open for the woman she had interviewed before me. She bowed and joyfully dismissed her.

Startled by her mere presence, I remained still until she put a hand on her forehead, pretending to scan the room in search of someone. She then turned towards me forcing her eyes.

"Are you ready?" She inquired in a challenging tone.

Surprised, I stood up and greeted her before going "Of course".

She swung her wrist and then extended her hand to point the way to her desk. I went in and could see papers, folders, binders and books piled up around. I didn't see any trash scattered, but it seemed like she couldn't care less about filing things into cabinets. In any case, I was not there to judge her space since, past from being unexpected, I couldn't care less either.

"Please sit down." She said, closing the door.

I did sit down but between us, on top of the desk, I noticed a mountain of papers, and she did too.

"Ah, excuse me, you can push them aside." Her hand waved but she was busy looking for something else. "I should probably start hanging those, huh?" She seemed to remind herself.

When I moved the pile of papers, it was impossible not to read the large letters on them. They all seemed to be diplomas, certificates, acknowledgement awards, and other papers in token of recognition. So there was more to Sawakiguchi A. than met the eye.

"You're Oreki Houtarou, if I recall right." She looked away before opening my file and checking if she had guessed correctly. "Ha! This still works." She pressed a finger against her temple. "I remember you're the one from that grandpa Oosaki's company. I never thought he'd sell his legendary bank."

"Neither did I." I mumbled.

"I guess so." She cackled. Leaving my papers aside and lowering the volume of her voice, Sawakiguchi leaned in closer. "Ever heard of the economic bump of the eighties?" She sat back and spoke in a normal volume. "You must have during college."

I nodded as she continued.

"The thing is, back then when I was much, much younger, my father and uncles used to work for Oosaki. From many other investors, he was one of the few who survived clean-handed. And all I heard my dad talk about was how strict and demented he was to them, but-" She clapped her hands and looked me straight in the eye. "Never once did my family miss a meal during the entire crisis."

The humble and childish smile reappeared on her face and her tone seemed much softer.

"I know that old man can be really picky about who can stay in his company, but if you made it through two years and only lost your job because he was no longer the owner, then you must be very resilient."

Perplexed by her overly assuring statements, and with no way of responding to them, I limited myself to only sharing a stuttered "Thanks".

After story-time with Sawakiguchi M. was over, and without further ado, she began to use the remaining fifty minutes of the interview by making her questions. Apart from her careless attitude, her questions were complex and stern, plus, she only wanted precise and compelling answers, no longer than two minutes.

Before our time was over, after she'd made all the questions she could tightly fit in fifty minutes, Sawakiguchi asked for my own. I didn't ask over three things, nothing out of the ordinary, unlike her. What she seemed to seek for in my replies was perspicacity, liability and morality. Never did she question my education, knowledge or capability, like if those were a given.

"So that settles it then." Her confident voice announced.

Confused, I thought she was dismissing me, but before I stood up, she kept talking nonstop.

"Ah… I will have the paperwork done soon, but they'll call you somewhere after Christmas." Her nonchalant tone once again poked a hole in my head.

She got up and went over to the door, but didn't stop there.

"Also," She held up an index before her chin. "You're not from around, so use the meantime to consider an area around here-"

With all the courtesy I could show, I stood up and talked over her.

"E-Excuse me, Director."

She looked over her shoulder and the same oblivious expression from a week ago was there again.

"What is it that you mean?"

Giggling, she let go of the doorknob and began waving her head sideways. "You really have no clue?"

I denied.

"Oreki Houtarou," She stretched out an opened hand in front of me. "Welcome."

…

In what seemed like the blinking of an eye, I was shaking Sawakiguchi's hand.

Once outside, the man who had received me, who I learned Ieyoshi Hide was his name, wrote down a phone number and other information on a piece of paper. He said they would call me when my contract was ready and I could come over to revise it, sign it and arrange the date of my arrival.

Everything seemed to move so fast and I felt in the middle of a highway, just walking one step at a time till I reached the ground floor. Until something woke me out of it.

I stopped at the center of the atrium, and looked up to the crystal entrance. Just crossing the reception, was Chitanda.

With a senseless expression, I stared at her. She waved a hand in a surprised greeting and even from afar her cheeks acquired a rose color. But I did not move an inch from my position until I realized she was now four feet away from me.

After our brief encounter, Chitanda had to dismiss herself with the same politeness.

"If you'll excuse me, I have to be going now. It was nice seeing you. Have a good day." She smiled.

We parted ways and so it went.

...


	3. Dreadful Mistake, Wistful Heart

…

It was when Tomoe visited for New Year's that I told my family about my new plans. Their responses were quite different.

"Sounds good, son." Said my calm father in the middle of a drink.

"Hold on… You did nothing for a month?!" Tomoe screamed as the champagne cork flew across the room.

Apart from them, nobody else knew about it, but I figured I'd mention Satoshi something along the way.

…

"Curse you, Sawakiguchi!" I yowled as I dropped dead on my mattress. "I can't take this any longer." I moaned into my pillow.

I had already decided on ending the whole riding back and forth in a circuit I could never accustom myself to. After a week of barely tolerating nausea and dizziness, I finally brought myself closer to a new workplace in Yokohama, Kanagawa.

With a fraction of my savings and the settlement I'd received at my previous job, I paid the deposit and moved into a plain, eight by ten meter, bachelor apartment no longer than fifteen minutes away from a train station.

I had already lived alone in a student house during college, and at home, with Dad working and Tomoe traveling, I was almost always by myself. Moving out wasn't that much of a dramatic change to me.

…

Although the motion sickness had finally stopped chasing me night after night, there was still something draining the little stamina I naturally owned.

Working for Sawakiguchi Misaki was much more demanding than what her carefree gestures implied. No wonder the salary was better considering I worked twice as hard. Managing bank accounts was less stressful, it always followed the same format and there wasn't much personal criteria involved. At Chitanda's company, things were not as simple as recording figures in a binnacle.

…

One particularly eventful day, Sawakiguchi had to leave the office early and Ieyoshi, my most direct coworker, had had an emergency to attend. Therefore, I had to follow my boss's requests, take over Ieyoshi's pending work, and assess my own responsibilities.

 _«_ _Don't worry, you have until the end of the day! »_ The prerecorded message left in my computer ended with my boss's ever so breezy tone.

Sawakiguchi was a strange woman. She acted so unprofessional and easygoing, yet her work was always done faultlessly and on time. People often questioned her methods but always praised her abilities.

Some big marketing project was coming, and there were days that went just beyond crazy. Everyone ran from here to there and several emergency meetings took place. That day was one of the wildest.

I sat on my desk and got things done according to how urgent they were. First, I went through January's actions book, then I took the papers another manager had left on Ieyoshi's desk and as I was about to start typing, a woman approached my desk asking for Sawakiguchi.

"She had to leave." I answered.

Making a grimace in concern, she thought hard before speaking again.

"But you're the assistant, right? Okay, come with me."

I didn't get the chance to ask what she meant before she took off and walked fast across the place. I followed her until we reached an office on the sixth floor. Inside, she patted a thick, heavy portfolio that she then laid on my hands.

"I was going to ask her to check-proof this, but I assume you can have it done instead. I need it by seven, I won't be able to take it earlier or later than that." She presumed and demanded with a sneer, looking at me over the frame of her glasses, as if asking me to leave at once.

I went back to my desk and dropped the portfolio, paining inside just at the sight of it. I hit my seat and little after, a man announced through the speakers a quick meeting happening within half an hour. Since only Sawakiguchi or Ieyoshi attended those, I didn't pay much attention. Until the announcer personally arrived.

"Isn't Ieyoshi-kun here?" He murmured but I still heard him clearly.

"He had to leave."

"But… since you're his replacement," He mumbled. "I'm afraid you'll have to take Sawakiguchi-san's notes instead." He claimed before running off to something else.

I never knew my eye could twitch that many times in one minute.

Nevertheless, I took a deep breath and checked on my time. It wasn't much encouraging to see sunlight dying through the windows. I had to hurry if I wanted to go home on time and not have to take an extra shift again on the same week.

…

The darkness of the night had already taken over the city and all I had to take care of had been cleared out. In the end, I did need extra hours to finish Sawakiguchi's report, which I delivered to the Head of Planning as she prepared to leave. Once again, my dearest motto had been violated.

"Would you be so kind to take this to Eru-sama?" Oda asked with that tone as of begging pardon.

I agreed and she thanked me as a smile carved into her wrinkled features.

As I wrapped everything up, the building quickly emptied and soon, only janitors and night guards remained. As well as Chitanda; who would usually leave after everyone was gone on especially booked days.

With one last resolution, I headed to the last floor. After all, nothing else would stop me from returning home.

…

Chitanda Eru.

She'd seemed genuinely glad when I ran into her after signing my contract, for which she congratulated and welcomed me through the same polite manners that always caught me unprepared. Apart from that day, I seldom ever saw her close in person, what I considered to be a good thing bearing in mind our strange connection outside of work. Only one time I'd seen her directing a general meeting, where her posture and elegancy remained untouched, but her speech was more solemn and less merry.

That was as far as I could go when describing Chitanda.

As to who I was looking for, Honami Naomi or nicknamed _Na-na_ , she was Chitanda's secretary. Honami was around her mid-thirties and always stayed close to Chitanda, like a bodyguard and a caretaker at the same time. She had a gentle but earnest personality, heedful of her job keeping things under control for our Deputy Director.

As I reached the last floor, I walked on a straight line where I would find two major offices, both with opaque glass doors and walls and a silver name plaque. The one on the left was temporarily shut and belonged to the Director General, Chitanda's father. And the one on the right was hers. In the middle of both of them was Honami's half-moon shaped desk, shielding.

Strangely, said safeguard was missing this time. However, the office's lights were still on.

Assuming Chitanda had already dismissed Honami, and wishing to call it a night sooner than later, I did not see another way to let her know I was entering but by excusing myself in. So I knocked my knuckles against the glass door and waited for a quick response. She didn't answer. I knocked again. Still, crude silence.

At this point I just wanted to get rid of the only thing that kept tied to the building. So I smoothly pushed the door open.

"Excuse me for entering like this." I said as I leafed through the report one last time, approaching her desk. "Since Oda-san had to leave, she asked me to bring you the-"

She did not even notice me, neither when opening the door nor when standing in front of her.

That high-spirited, always so courteously smiling image I kept of her, it soon shattered upon fixing my gaze forward.

…

Her hands were clenching an embroidered handkerchief against her lips. Despite her naturally pale skin, there was almost no color on her face. And her eyes, the same ones who always sparkled with energy, were now shadowed and lost. On top of it all, tears were slowly rolling down her cheeks.

Speechless by witnessing something so unnatural, I stepped closer, slowly. As I placed the papers in front of her in a gentle movement, her eyes suddenly widened.

"Ah, Oreki-san." She reacted in surprise once realizing of my presence. Her face went from translucent to flushed in the twinkling of an eye.

She didn't even lift her head up while immediately rubbing her eyes with the handkerchief she held onto. She tried to smile but her lips could barely stand the effort.

"I was waiting for Sawakiguchi-san's report. I will review it and send any comments to her." She held it weakly and placed it on top of a stack of papers in front of her. Her hands subtly trembled. "I am sorry you had to stay until this late."

Her voice was extremely brittle and filled with bad-hidden anguish. Not once did her eyes meet me.

"You are free to leave, thank you."

I bowed my head absentmindedly before making a half-turn to leave. But even I couldn't turn around like nothing had happened. Telling myself I would probably regret it, I bit my lip before turning back to her.

"Is something the matter?"

To my question the only responses I could imagine regarded work and only work. But, in her position, those were things she should have been able to endure long ago.

However, the words seemed to stab her chest for the way she flinched. Her eyes, looking astray, soon flooded. A single teardrop hit the surface of the folder, leaving its irregularly round shape impregnated on the paper.

"Chitanda-san…?"

"Oh, no! I dampened your work. Ex-Excuse me, I-I'll change the folder." She responded fast before another tear escaped her eye.

Rapidly standing up, she reached for a bookshelf placed by the wall. Pulling out another white and purple folder, she turned her back towards me. Then she stood immobile and silent for a moment.

"Oreki-san… You are free to leave now." She murmured with a frail voice. "I don't feel right letting you see me like this."

The entire building's architecture appeared designed to let in as much light as possible, and at night, the led lamps on the ceilings had the same illuminating purpose. Yet, there was nothing the shining lights above her head could do to brighten her image.

The shadow she projected had rotted the lively armor she always wore. Her head was down. Her knees shivering.

Then she turned towards me, still looking at the floor and holding the folder tightly against her chest, like a shield for the subtle pride that still remained inside.

My eyes widened at this barely standing image of her.

"… S-Sure, I will be on my way out…" I said. "But, are you sure you'll be alright?"

"I will, thank you. I'll leave later, do not worry." Her withered tone did not change.

Slowly, she took a step forward, getting closer to a sofa in front of her desk as if trying to reach it and sit down.

"Chitanda-san!"

Too fast for me to process it, Chitanda had leaned over the chair and grabbed it strongly in an attempt to not fall onto the floor. In a blink, I had walked up to her and grasped her arm. The folder was now on the floor.

It seemed as if she had been about to faint; luckily, she was able to sit down. Considering how stressful the days had been and how dispirited she looked, I figured her body must've reached a limit at which she could easily collapse.

« She can't even stand on her own feet. » I thought; annoyed as if her weakness was forcing me to stay.

Making sure she was still conscious since her eyes were lost between erratic and slow blinks, I spoke to her.

"I don't mean to make you uncomfortable, but… is there anyone I can call to come see you? Maybe Honami-san?"

After her eyes flickered and she was back, I could barely hear her voice.

"No, I would scare her." She mumbled, probably not out of dismay but mere shyness.

Well, surely she had startled me.

"This building is almost empty, if you faint then there won't be anyone to come help…" I tried my best to give her a soft, calming tone. "Do you mind if I stay until you feel less uneasy?"

Just what was I saying? I had no idea. But Chitanda seemed stubborn and letting her leave the building in such a weak and emotional state was not a risk worth taking.

However, I was being realistic, as soon as I stepped out of her office, she'd be left alone to her luck. Not that there was much that I could do.

"… You are not obligated to do so." With a blank but louder voice, she replied.

"Then," I reached for the embroidered handkerchief on top of my report and offered it to her as tears invaded her eyes again. "I'll stay until you are at least able to stand up."

Exactly as she'd said, as an employee and even a weak contact, I had no responsibility over what happened to her despite how vulnerable she'd become before my eyes. However, while I wasn't known for consoling those in sorrow, I wasn't cold-hearted enough to run off.

…

For a while, neither of us said a word.

I had already picked up the fallen folder and changed for the one on her desk. The tear mark was gone and the cardboard was now creased.

I sat on the other seat left in the room, a sofa placed against a wall in front of her desk, while she just remained still, thoughtful after her tears had stopped. It was then when her voice had gained some strength that she spoke out loud, possibly not to me, but to herself.

"My uncle." A bleak tenor echoed in the room. "The police contacted me…"

Chitanda obviously knew I couldn't understand what she was talking about. But, I wasn't there to comprehend anything, and if she needed to let the thoughts that tormented her so much morph into words, then, maybe a pair of ears was all that could serve her not to feel abandoned inside her own mind.

"Your uncle?" I asked just to avoid the icy silence.

"He disappeared two years ago. My family has been waiting for news since then…" She played with her fingers before continuing. "… A police officer asked me to go to Tokyo's city morgue…"

"…" I didn't know how to respond even if I opened my mouth.

"They found someone who matches his complexion, but his face is de-deformed…" Her lips quivered and it became harder for her to breathe.

She couldn't help it and inevitably, her voice lost courage and her speech became corrupted by heavy breathing.

"… T-They need me to recognize the corpse because I am the only relative in Japan… I can only pray it's not him… Just… Don't let it be him…!" Her last sentence sounded more like a whisper, or a prayer.

"Chitanda…" I murmured in disbelief.

That confession was much beyond what I would have expected to hear from her.

Then she started sobbing, helplessly. Not out loud, but quietly hiding herself from everything else. Her back arched and her shoulders started trembling. The laced handkerchief she never let go of was her only support.

I stayed where I was, waiting for her to reincorporate herself until all she had to say, murmur and cry had been told in between tears.

…

After who knows how long, she'd gone completely silent again. Her black hair shadowed her face, but I could see the exhaustion underneath. It had been a long and heavy day for receiving such an alarming call.

All I could tell her I said it once her eyes were dry.

"Unfortunately," Her head moved towards me but her glance was still fallen. "I don't know who your uncle is. But, as far as I can tell, you miss him too much for him not to be a good man. Since he's surely always known that, then I am certain he wouldn't put you through this, had it been his choice to make."

I stood up without losing her attention and continued at a soft volume. There was no other way I could mitigate my outspoken thoughts as I couldn't imprint much emotion in my voice.

"Sadly, you are all the family he can count on right here, right now. Then, it is you who has to find the determination to endure this. I cannot fathom just how frightening it must be to be in your shoes, so I'm afraid I don't believe I can help you."

I walked around the chair to face her, next, crouching on my heels so we could be at the same height, I tried to ask in the mildest tone I could mold my voice into.

"I think it's better for you to be home now. Wouldn't you prefer that?"

Her eyes were still big and looked adrift, and her mouth slightly opened when she gasped as though being the most astonished she had the energy to.

Still, I could clearly hear her say "Yes."

I got up and exhaled.

"Let's go, then."

…

Chitanda followed whatever direction I took, and it felt like guiding a scared child through a dark place. Fearing somebody else would encounter her with a red nose and slightly swollen eyes, she walked behind me. As she was overall smaller than me, anyone would hardly see her at first front glance. However, as I'd stated, the place was almost deserted.

We reached the underground floor, which only functioned as the parking lot. Since I didn't own a car myself, I would usually take the train back home, but it was too late for that. However, she had a white Toyota, which we were searching for through the pillars of the almost empty place.

The only security guard in the floor was a grown up man taking care of the barrier gate. Then there were Chitanda and I, standing next to the pilot's door of her car. It was our time to part ways, although, I still believed she could faint in the middle of the highway and, again, it wasn't a risk worth taking.

"Is there someone you can call to come pick you up?" I asked.

"I will be fine driving myself." She tried to sound assuring with her weak voice.

"I don't think you'll be able to." I externalized the uneasy feeling it gave me.

My mind was running out of possibilities, but an idea came to it.

"I'll go get a guard, maybe he could drive you."

I half-turned around when I felt a loose grasp on the sleeve of my coat. It was her pale hand, keeping me from moving.

"I-I… don't want anybody else to see me like this, Oreki-san." She confessed.

My eyes opened blankly at the realization. Of course, leaving her under the eyes of a guard was easier than staying with her myself, but less inconsiderate than leaving her alone. I never thought through what Chitanda by her own will would choose.

Regardless of how much of a good relationship she sought for with her family's employees, there was no possible way for her to know every single person working in the building. Let alone trust a night guard she'd probably never spoken to, be left alone with her in such a state.

Perhaps, I inferred, the only reason why she had allowed me to listen to her was because, at some degree, Chitanda knew me. She already had my oldest friends as a reference. Upon this thread of conclusions, I felt uncomfortably burdened with such an overestimation.

"You will have to take a taxi to arrive home, will you not?" She suddenly wondered in a louder volume. When I turned back to face her, I found her pulling out a card from her purse. "Feel free to charge it onto the company."

She extended her hand towards me. Perplexed by this and soon feeling my face heating up, I rose my hands and slowly waved them in denial.

"It's fine, really, I was already planning on taking one." I spoke fast.

But she took my hand between hers, placed the card on my palm and then closed it.

"Please do use it." She begged. "I will be able to drive myself home, I'm feeling much better now." She smiled and met my eyes while showing her open hands. "See? I _really_ am much better now."

A trace of her ever cheerful tone coated her words, trying to sound more convincing than earlier. Her hands indeed looked as if blood was finally flowing through them and her face had a rosy blush to it now.

At a loss, I nodded in agreement. I chose to believe in Chitanda's determination and set free from a responsibility was never bound to be mine.

…

I did as she'd asked and grabbed a cab to return to my apartment. When analyzing the card she'd given me, I realized it was the same sort that Sawakiguchi sometimes gave to Ieyoshi when something could be charged as a "business-related expense", such as a coffee with investors or a taxi drive to a meeting.

Biding my time on the back sit of the taxi until I reached my destination, I pondered on that very night over and over.

It was bothersome just to reflect on the simple recapitulation of all I could have avoided had I stepped out of her office the moment I turned around. Especially because it was not something I _had_ to do.

Yet, as furious as I wanted to be for letting myself dive knee-deep into an unnecessary level of consideration for someone who I still doubted I truly knew, I couldn't find the energy to feel anger. My whole body felt as though it was made out of lead and I could barely drag my legs when walking into the building. The only thing I fancied at that very moment was to hit my pillow and sleep till next day.

…

The time it took to get home and even when I was finally there, my mind kept drifting towards the forlorn picture of Chitanda hiding behind a handkerchief, waiting for the fear crawling down her spine to let her breathe.

The reminiscent grieved echo of her words as she spoke of a missing one depicted her at the back of my mind as a little girl curling up under the desk, crying out loud for someone to come hold her. But nobody came. In the end, she was left alone in the darkness, as vulnerable and wrecked as an abandoned child.

Because I wasn't able to empathize her strong emotions, then, I wondered, what had pushed me into expressing an amount of compassion not even I believed I could? I still was not so sure myself.

In a way, I apologized for not having better words to say, but somebody like me would have never taken the position of a confidant to begin with.

I sighed from deep inside and decided to let go of my now futile regrets.

…

No matter how tired I was the night before, I still woke up on time to go to work.

That day, I did not see her, or heard of her. I came up with two conclusions inside my head. Either she had been too exhausted to wake up, and too sad to attend work. Or she was in Tokyo, visiting a cold place full of dead bodies. The latter made more sense.

As to my regarding, Sawakiguchi called me into her office that afternoon.

"You took three extra shifts only this week!" She grumbled. "You'll be better off working the morning shift. From next week on, be sure to make it here by eight, okay?"

I didn't know how I was supposed to feel, but at least I wouldn't have to complain about losing the last train any longer. But I still had one question to make.

"People keep asking for your assistant but I don't think I understand why they call me that. Should I ask why?"

"You probably shouldn't but that's because I thought you'd figure it out by now." She chuckled. "Oreki, I picked ten accountants last year. Ask yourself why are yours and Ieyoshi's _cubicles_ " She mimicked a pair of quotation marks with her fingers. "right next to my office?"

She then opened the door and left me out.

"But… why me?"

"Ciao!" She smiled and shut the door.

She was indeed a strange woman. But thinking of her, it reminded me of the day before.

If she hadn't left her office and Ieyoshi hadn't come down sick, I wouldn't have seen Chitanda tumbling down in tears, nor would I have heard of her family's misfortune. I was not so much of a believer of something as superstitious as fate, yet, such a coincidental situation certainly threw me off.

Later, Ieyoshi too apologized for another missing day and asked how things had gone.

"You wouldn't buy it." I answered, adrift into my own thoughts.

The rest of the day went as usual.

…

The next Monday, starting a new workshift, I arrived to the building early enough to notice Chitanda's white car entering the parking lot. I wondered if she had actually gone to the morgue, and, though wishing the contrary, if the corpse did belong to her relative.

We ran into each other later that day, only the two of us inside the elevator, when I was on my way out.

"Are you leaving early, Oreki-san?" She inquired confused as I crossed the metallic frame.

I slowly opened my mouth. "Yes, I was changed to the morning shift."

"I see. That is good." She smiled and spoke warmly.

We were both going to the ground floor, so there was no need for me to press the button.

She changed the subject once the elevator closed its doors.

"I finally traveled to Tokyo on Saturday." She declared and trace of melancholy remained in her gaze.

"… How are you?" At the top of my ability, I tried to sound empathetic instead of hostile.

"I did not enter to see the body." She stuck a strand of hair behind her ear while continuing. "When I arrived, there were already agents from the Criminal Investigation Bureau."

I opened my eyes wider in awe.

Sixth floor.

The elevator seemed to stop for a moment, but kept moving gently afterwards. Chitanda quietened, probably at the thought of someone else getting inside. She then continued at a soft voice.

"They found out, through some specific traits, that he was a long-chased bill falsifier. His face lost shape after a fight with another falsification ring concluded in a fire…" She sounded sorry. "The officer that contacted me confused his file with my uncle's."

"Sounds really shady." I raised my eyebrows. Aside from that, it was shocking to think that a simple mistake had inflicted her so much pain.

"Indeed, it does."

She pressed her thin lips together as if feeling apologetic for this man's painful death.

Fifth floor.

"But it's a good thing you weren't involved, seeing a corpse can be really traumatizing." I said with plain honesty.

"I suppose I should be thankful for that." Her expression relaxed but it still looked wistful. "My uncle remains missing for sure… This was the only news I had heard of him in a very long time. I never considered the possibility of him being dead because I thought I'd find myself believing so. And that scared me."

Fourth floor.

Twiddling her thumbs, Chitanda made a short pause in her speech.

"However, because my uncle remains missing, even if he could be gone, he could also be alive. I have chosen to stop retaining myself from thinking about him only because I'm terrified and instead, hope for the best." She smiled.

Third floor.

Again, the elevator made a stop, but this time it was not a quick moment. Somebody had actually called for it. It was a woman, who looked older than both of us, carrying a stack of papers. For Chitanda's greeting, I found out her name was Sone, and thanks to the badge on her shoulder, that she worked in human resources.

Second floor.

After a kind "Have a nice evening", the woman got off. Chitanda kept on after a short silence, when the elevator started descending.

"I would appreciate it greatly if we could keep this in private…" She murmured.

"I won't even mention it." I promised in the same low voice.

We did not look at each other as we wholeheartedly concurred on this.

First floor.

"I feel rather embarrassed because you saw me falling apart solely out of fear." A complexed grin accompanied her words.

"That's nothing to be ashamed of, if that is how you are." I said staring at the electronic letter above the metallic doors as it changed of number.

She turned her big eyes towards me at a surprise.

"But do be careful, you're still this building's current highest authority. If you're feeling that uneasy, watch out for who to rely on, not everybody has wholesome intentions."

Ground floor.

"I forgot to thank you." With a comforted glance, she looked back down, grinning. "Oreki-san, what you did was more than I could ever thank you and apologize to you for." After closing her eyes softly, she opened them and glanced at me, smiling humbly.

"Thank you, Oreki-san."

Her eyes glimmered, again with a trapping vivacity I was never ready for.

"It's nothing."

The doors opened as on cue to Chitanda's gratitude.

We arrived and parted ways after coming out of the lift. She walked towards the receptionist's desk. I crossed the glass doors to the street.

The air was thin and cold, so I held onto my scarf as snow began to fall from a white, peaceful sky. Winter felt rather soothing all of a sudden.

…

The night Chitanda received a dreadful call from a police station in Tokyo, I learned more about her. Just how sensitive she could be, but also, that even when vulnerable she still defended her dignity. She was of an alienating emotional nature I could not understand in the slightest.

However, I persisted on asking myself what I actually knew about her. Surely not enough to let myself get too involved in her life or to need her in mine.

No matter the connections we had with the same old friends, she was my superior before an acquaintance. Let alone a friend. We had crossed a line between professionalism and friendship out of an unlikely circumstance. But that had been all.

« Keep your distance, Oreki Houtarou. » I advised myself.

…

* * *

Those elevators must be very slow haha cx Hope you enjoyed! :)


	4. Isn't Spring Refreshing?

Chapter 4 - Isn't Spring Refreshing?

Unlike Tomoe, I had never stepped onto a plane. Because of my own life choices, I'd never had the need, nor the wish to; until I came to work for Chitanda.

…

The last Wednesday of May, as I was getting ready to leave for lunch break, my superior called me into her office. Just as I went in, her order was simple and straightforward.

" _Hokkaido."_

At first I wanted to ask why me, then it became more important to use all logic and persuade her not to send such an inexperienced accountant on a business trip. But all of my arguments were dodged even before they were formulated into words.

"Since I have more important issues to solve outside of town at this very moment, and Ieyoshi had another emergency, you'll be going on my behalf." Her unusual stern tone dictated.

Later that day, when the commotion of the department had dispelled, Sawakiguchi explained that I had to attend a few conferences in the name of our division. It was impossible for any of the superiors to go and apparently the job was simple and merely symbolic, so much that Sawakiguchi could afford to send just about anyone. It was my luck to be said anyone.

"When do I leave?" A swallowed sigh.

But I wasn't going by myself.

…

A few weeks had passed since I'd last talked to Chitanda the way we did on the elevator. After that day, we didn't run into each other more than a couple of times and just for a few minutes, sometimes just a few seconds. Until we were driven to the airport, all we exchanged were polite and reciprocated greetings.

On the plane she sat by the window, while I did by the corridor. Honami was there too, sitting in between. However, at that moment, I couldn't care less about our seats.

I didn't feel nervous, but because I knew the boundaries of my own stability, I was anxious from anticipating the sickness. Therefore, I had a somehow rude plan, and that was to sleep through the entire flight. I doubted Honami would forbid me from doing so, and I knew Chitanda wouldn't want to bother me unless it was necessary. All I could pray for was not to vomit amid-flight.

As I lied back on the seat, I could feel the shakiness of the metal walls and floor so present that I immediately knew the plan would only go so far. For however long it was, all I could remember was a moment of darkness before a hand shaking my shoulder brought me back to consciousness.

My eyes were halfway open but I managed to follow Honami and Chitanda's footsteps once we landed. Then I realized I was getting onto a cab's back seat, and that was when I heard Chitanda's concerned voice calling out my name.

"Oreki-san, are you feeling ill?"

"I'm fine, no need to worry." I must have mumbled without convincing her in the least as she kept telling Honami something along the lines of:

"He seems dizzy. Can the driver slow down just a little, please?"

I tried to stay awake but, judging from Chitanda's expression, I must've looked as though about to die. As we kept moving, things kept losing clarity and my head kept throbbing as if exploding.

When we arrived to the hotel, I sat down to see if the steadiness of an unmoving place felt reassuring enough to regain some energy. While I was resting, Honami seemed to have an issue with the receptionists for the little I could hear. After a long while, she came back with Chitanda next to her and discussed something about one of the rooms not being available.

Honami sounded upset while Chitanda had more of a concerned tone in her voice. Even when my eyes remained closed, I felt theirs looking my way.

 _« Please ignore me, it wasn't my intention to worry either of you. »_ I wanted to say.

A shorter while went by before a bellhop directed the way to the elevator and then what could be a provisional room.

Chitanda kept a hand on my back as we entered the place and then asked me to lie down while Honami talked to the guy. As I followed her instruction, she left the bedroom and slid the door closed. My senses were not completely aware, but I could listen to part of their conversation when the bellhop was gone.

"I must get going at once. Will you be staying here, Eru-sama?" Honami sounded pressured.

"I think so. Oreki-san is not feeling very well. I'm going to stay here in case he needs to go to a hospital." _Uh-oh._ There was a strong ring of consternation.

"Of course. I'll see you later, then. I hope Oreki-kun gets well soon."

"Be careful, Nana-san."

One door was shut and another was opened, as I could hear. Then the back of a pale hand pressed gently against my forehead. There was a gasp.

"Oreki-san, do you happen to suffer from motion sickness?"

"Seems like it." I mumbled.

Chitanda bit her lip and frowned at my appearance. If my face wasn't red from the fever, then it most surely was from embarrassment.

"You should have mentioned this before, then you wouldn't have gone through all of this." She scolded.

I tried apologizing again, but she left the room and quickly came back to place a wet towel over my forehead, releasing the fever.

"I'll be back soon." She announced and then left again.

…

The last I remembered was the fuzzy image of Chitanda's figure, the bitterness of a pill at the back of my throat and the later sweetness of chamomile tea. Then it all went black. Not as in a state of complete unconsciousness, but just deep, blank sleep.

…

A buzzing sound woke me up. My phone was vibrating in my pocket and once I looked at the time displayed on the screen, I realized I'd been sleeping for at least three hours.

As soon as I picked up, I heard a relieved voice at the other end of the line.

" _Ah, Oreki-kun, good thing you answer."_ At past ten, Honami was calling.

Still rubbing my wrist against my eyes, I stood up, listening to her fast words.

" _I'm trapped in a traffic jam, so it will take me a while to get back to the hotel… Eru-sama doesn't seem to be available, is she around?"_

It was not my intention to be rude, but when I opened the door to the living room, I stopped paying much attention to her message.

On top of the coffee table, sleeping over her arms as a pillow, was Chitanda. Confused at the little I remembered, I looked over my shoulder. On top of the dresser next to the bed was a metallic tray holding a bottle of water, a teacup and a pharmacy bag. I scratched the back of my head as bits and pieces came back to mind.

"… _Oreki-kun?"_

I'd forgotten about Honami, who was still talking.

"Ah, yes… She fell asleep." I replied.

" _I see… Then, could you please do me a favor?"_

I agreed and wrote a short note for Chitanda using the pen and paper left next to the room's phone. Then I went back to the living room just to find her lying in the exact same position. Her shoulders moved softly at the pace of her breathing, but other than so, she looked like a porcelain doll that had been fixated to remain just like that.

But staring at her for too long was an insolent gesture of mine after all the trouble I'd caused.

 _« Are you a child? »_ I wondered in silence.

I wrote on a piece of paper that Honami wouldn't be back as soon as expected and that the issue about the unavailable room had been solved. Since the two of them would share a room, I would be given one on a different floor. They didn't have to bear with me any longer, so I left quietly so she wouldn't wake up.

…

The next day I woke up in a different bed, this time I was by myself. In the morning nothing important was said and the first gathering had only been for the executives of the guest companies, so I didn't have to attend that.

Later at noon I joined Chitanda and Honami at the hotel's restaurant for lunch. Honami seemed busy since she left right after finishing her meal, leaving Chitanda and me alone at the table as we were finishing off lunch.

"Are you feeling better?" Chitanda said, realizing that I was fully recovered from the night before.

"Ah…" I diverted my gaze for a few seconds. "Yes. Thanks for the medicine."

"I'm glad it worked." She smiled. Next she opened her eyes wider as if something important had come to mind. "I had something I wanted to ask you."

"What is the matter?"

Chitanda suddenly lowered her voice, not in a murmur, but just with enough discretion to keep her words private.

"I was wondering if you were aware of the incident with the room yesterday." She said, to which I believed she was talking about me being sick the night before.

"About only one room being ready? Honami-san sounded upset-" I started, but stopped the second I saw her shaking her head.

"No, I mean, the reason why it was not available." I shook my head slowly, to which she looked mildly disappointed. "Yesterday, Honami-san and I were indeed upset because we thought the hotel had failed to prepare the room on time. Soon we found out that the second room had not been reserved because the expense was never covered."

She spoke as the tip of her thumb kept running over the rim of the teacup. With the end of her explanation, she looked at me, waiting for an answer. Logically speaking, I should have known about the expense, after all, I was there on behalf of someone who did.

"Sawakiguchi-san mentioned that the expense had been cleared over two weeks ago, but other than that, I don't recall any specifics." I responded as she listened carefully.

"I see." She began to nod softly. "Well, since the expense was taken care of as an emergency, I will need you to assist us with a proper report so that we can justify it to the company."

As we agreed on this and our cups and plates were empty, we left the table.

…

The rest of the day was slowly consumed by a series of meetings and presentations, so the only available time I had to take care of Chitanda's requests was in between breaks. At one point in the evening, while a new conference was about to start, she and I waited for Honami to join us. We began to talk about the unreserved room during this meantime.

Chitanda's words followed the same volume at all times, what changed was the increasing tone of worry mixed with intrigue.

"It's just…" Unexpectedly, she leaned in forward and murmured in a contained voice of both fascination and anxiety. "I can't stop thinking about it!"

But her words were not as intense as the grip of her gaze. A pair of deep, wide pupils could turn into a black hole if stared at for more than a second. This feeling of transparency was paralyzing.

In a matter of seconds, a rumbling thud drove our gazes apart, just as the entire audience flinched under the same coordination and the place went immediately dead silent. As a chair hit the wooden floor, a threateningly low-pitched voice that could be clearly heard from over a mile of radius, rose a couple of meters behind our table.

"IS THAT _MY_ PROBLEM?!" The coarse voice echoed.

"Sir, forgive me if that seemed to be implied, I-" The incomparably smaller voice of a young bellhop mumbled in an attempt to maintain him at peace.

But with a speech too crude to be heard, the brute man demanded to see a superior.

Even as most people witnessed the scene in awe, while others decided on ignoring it, the suited man did not tone down his vulgar speech. He seemed irrationally mad but never gave the guy a chance to explain the situation.

Several hours earlier, a banner had been placed outside of the conference room, announcing some changes on the programs of some companies. Even before that, the manager had met with each company to notify and apologize for the trouble. But this bestial-looking executive was obviously unaware of the entire subject.

Just when he inched closer as if about to eat the small guy alive, the short, squeaking sound of a chair being abruptly dragged broke in the man's anger.

When I drifted my gaze towards the origin of the sound, I found Chitanda standing up decisively with her hands placed one over the other. While I stared believing hers was a bad idea, she began to speak as soon as the man turned his harshly tanned face towards her.

"Sir, excuse me, but I'm afraid you are disrupting the activities of this group." She spoke in an incredibly calmed tone, even when the man looked as though he wouldn't hold back his foul tongue in front of a lady. Still, she kept on without stammering a single syllable.

"I understand your vexation if you were not notified of the schedule being changed. The hotel staff informed us that all of the conferences in room B would be delayed by two hours." She gestured a hand in the direction of his nametag. "If I'm not mistaken, Akagi's Telemarketing Company's conference should take place within one hour in room C."

I didn't turn around, but it was obvious that many eyes were fixated in admiration, mine included. Her speech didn't end there.

"If you have any complaints, I'd suggest you to speak directly with the manager instead of inappropriately treating the personnel. Please do follow the indications previously given. And as of my intervention, I apologize." And so, her lecture came to a period.

Chitanda's head bowed once for her suggestion and once more as an exculpation. The eloquence and serenity surrounding her were the entire opposite to the way he looked.

Vexed by his own mistake being exposed, his eyes became red and veins grew thicker on his temple. Then a short, dry laugh followed.

"And you are?" He rose a brow and we could hear the friction of his teeth being tightly pressed together.

As he was about to give a step forward, standing up and reaching an arm out to Chitanda came out as a reflex. But he stopped moving, yet Chitanda did not break her straight posture and proceeded to retort shortly.

"My name is Chitanda Eru, an attendant of this conference."

I heard the man's knuckles crack loudly, but my eyes were still on her. When looking the other way, just over his shoulders, I glimpsed the hotel staff mouthing thanking words and putting their hands together. No longer than a few seconds later, one of the staff members approached the man, trying to distract him from Chitanda, who still didn't shiver before his swollen eyes and creased frown.

"Sir, the manager has been summoned, please follow this way."

And so he was taken out of the place, returning peace to the meeting. Conversations kept on as if nothing had happened, but Chitanda became rather quiet. When the people around stopped laying their attention on our table, she placed a hand on her chest and sighed in relief, heavily closing her eyes.

After that incident, I'd learnt two things. One, Chitanda had a scarily keen memory. And two, she had some guts.

"You really took him out of it, Chitanda-san." I remarked.

"Did I? I feared being overly aggressive would make things worse."

"You did quite the opposite and it worked surprisingly well."

"I don't like conflict, but I cannot simply sit and watch someone being so unfairly mistreated like that." Her upset tone was too polite to seem aggressive.

"Though, there was no way the man could have missed the message if he went through the same doors we did." I mentioned careless about the implications.

However, to this her eyes opened wider, and I quickly casted mine down before feeling cornered again.

"It was just an assumption." I tried to shrug it off.

"But what do you mean?" She asked.

"Well, perhaps the staff, thinking all guests already knew about the changes, took down the banners at the entrance when the conference started. That's why the guy, trying to defend himself by saying something like _'Everybody, including you, should've known this already'_ , dug himself a deeper hole when the man mistook it as an attempt to outsmart him."

"What makes you say that?" She inquired.

"When the man turned this way, other staff members rushed out with the guy. Again, I was just speculating." I reminded her.

Barely lifting my gaze, I saw that hers was no longer on me, taking away an odd pressure.

"Then… Perhaps I shouldn't have said anything, should I?" She pressed her lips together and her frown creased a little.

"Oh, no, he deserved it."

Keeping my guess in mind, Chitanda tried to find out how much truth there was to it. When Honami arrived little after, she asked her if there were any banners at the entrance doors.

"They were putting a couple up just now." Honami answered.

Chitanda seemed impressed by that as she went back to stare at me with fascination. Then the conference began and we didn't touch the matter again.

…

That night I visited Chitanda and Honami's room again only to provide all the information I could find that lead to the answer she'd asked for. I went through as much as I could from a distance and very little was useful. I explained to her that everything Sawakiguchi had arranged was in order, at least from what I had with me. Technically, there shouldn't have been any problems, yet, the hotel couldn't explain a mistake that hadn't been theirs.

By the time she'd asked all the questions I could answer, the night had only gone darker. At this point I decided to wish them a good sleep and leave the place. I had no guarantee, but I noticed she wasn't willing to sleep just yet.

…

Saturday felt like the truly hectic peak of the trip, as we had been moving from one place to the next one, meeting and talking to the people Sawakiguchi had warned me about. Under such a tight agenda, there was hardly any spare time. Both lunch and dinner were also set to meet with executives, exchange pleasantries and have thorough talks over a bunch of technicalities.

When the day was over, it felt as though my soul had already escaped my body, only to meet me again the next morning.

…

Sunlight drenched the curtains of the room in such brightness, that it was impossible to reconcile with one's sleep. And so, Sunday arrived but it didn't threaten to go as heavily as the previous days had.

Hours were packed with conferences and meetings until early evening, when we were given a break before the closing event. I took a short while and went back to my room to pack up my suitcase, then decided to have some coffee since the day had been a little too cold for spring to be so close.

Walking through the halls of the building, I could appreciate better the place at a slow pace. The wallpaper wasn't necessarily eccentric, at that, it was actually plain and the wall lamps along the way were minimalistic in design as well. As these useless realizations slowly formed in my head, I kept my eyes down, following the straight lines on the carpet under my feet.

When a pair of high heels came across my footsteps, I stopped and looked up. It was Chitanda, coming from an intersecting hall at the ground floor. She smiled.

"Oreki-san. Are you heading towards the restaurant?"

I nodded.

"I'm about to meet Honami-san there."

We kept on walking without saying anything, but at some point it felt natural. By the time we got there, Honami was already sipping on a cup of black tea. Chitanda ordered a latte, while I went for an Americano.

Halfway through the drinks Honami began to explain what we would be doing next. Then, as our cups became empty, she packed up her agenda and pen.

"You will have two hours to do whatever you'd like, and I'll meet you before the dismissing gathering." Honami said with a surprisingly relaxed expression, or perhaps she was just tired.

On our way out, we stopped at the entrance of the hotel and she turned to face both of us with a kind smile.

"Please be careful."

…

For some reason I ended up joining Chitanda in her search for the local market instead of heading back to my room to get some rest. She mentioned there was a very large library somewhere along the way, so I thought a book would do me well since it'd be a long way back to Yokohama.

We walked straight ahead until I could no longer see the hotel's doors, when it was too late to turn back. I stayed behind her the entire time and we kept the same easy pace until it became subconscious. At one point she stopped in front of two large glass doors. It was the promised library, perfectly placed on a quiet street.

"Here it is. Shall we?" She turned to ask. I nodded.

We didn't spend much time wandering through the vastly packaged bookshelves since the place was quite big and there wouldn't be enough time to go through every single hall thoroughly. Chitanda bought a book which title I never knew, as for me, a lot caught my eye but in the end I decided on a short novel classified under suspense.

A few blocks ahead was the local market Chitanda wanted to see, but since it was an interest of _hers_ , I saw no point on joining that part of the plan. She understood even without me saying anything, and in fact suggested that I enjoyed my book and felt free to leave on my own. So she left while I took in her idea.

…

Sitting at one of the reading tables in front of the bookshelves, I began to go through the pages of the book I'd just bought. By the time I looked at my wristwatch, I realized I'd been there for about twenty minutes, enough time to finish off the first chapter and leave.

Out on the street I looked both ways before beginning to walk. Since there was still about an hour left till Honami met with us, I didn't feel pressured to run over to the next location. So I started to walk in the same direction we had earlier.

As I got closer to a long line of stalls that tracedthe sidewalk, the characteristic mumbling of a market became louder. Thanking I didn't have to suffocate in it, I looked over as I kept on walking. But even amidst the loudness, a cry began to steal my attention.

From the street I could see isle after isle full of wandering people. At one point, the whining became clearer. Squinting my eyes to focus, I spotted Chitanda. Not far from one of the entrances, she stood in front of a child crying at the top of his lungs.

I stopped moving forward and instead got a few steps closer to one of the outer stalls. From there, I could clearly see her bend over, calmly speaking to the kid until his whining ended. It was particularly odd to see her comfort a child in the middle of a moving crowd. As the child stopped sobbing, she grabbed his little hand and began approaching people on the way.

For the obvious concern reflected on her face, I suspected something was wrong. Being rather close to where she stood while looking in several directions, I walked into the market and soon got to her.

"Chitanda-san?" I called out.

To my voice coming from behind, she turned around in a quick jolt, looking surprised once she saw me.

"Oreki-san, what brings you here?" She wondered with a tilted head.

I looked down at the small kid holding onto her hand. She followed my gaze and jolted again as she began to explain the situation.

"Oh! You see, I was looking at something outside and then I saw he was about to cross the street on his own. So I grabbed him and waited to see if he was with his parents, but no one came after him. I've asked some people but so far no one knows whose he is." The last statement was weaker and made her voice sound thinner.

The way she rushed through her words was not easy to follow, but the message was clear. She kept switching her eyes from the child to the people passing by and then back to him. As for the kid, he stared blankly at me.

"I could take him to the police station, but at least I want to try."

Children were meant to have large begging eyes, but I wasn't so sure adults were allowed to own such a wholesome trait. It was plain to see Chitanda's determination to help, just as it was plain to hear a genuine tone of concern in her voice. There was also the little kid, who kept sobbing while extending his short arms upwards, asking her to scoop him off the ground. And so she did.

I could have turned around and walked my own way. Yet, something about this picture must have convinced me that two heads were better than one. Well, three in this situation.

"How long have you been looking for?"

While the rest of her features remained the same, her lips curved into a subtle grin. My message was clear too.

…

We didn't split, but walked through every isle, with her asking on one side while I did the same on the other. Not once did she put the kid down, who still held tightly onto her shoulder.

Around twenty minutes later we were already close to the far end of the market, that's when I made sense out of her choosing to bear with the child's weight, even though he was able to walk. Dragging the toddler by the hand that far would have been heartless.

At the point where we stood, some stalls were closed and the amount of people was considerably less. To fill in the silent gaps between asking people, Chitanda began a trivial conversation.

"If I may ask, do you happen to have any little siblings, Oreki-san?"

"I only have an older sister." I answered half-heartedly after another man denied knowing the child.

"How wonderful."

Even at her best attempt to remain at ease, the following _'No, I'm sorry'_ from another passing woman made her words sound rather forced. I tried to comprehend she was growing discouraged, but my perspective didn't go beyond feeling pity for the lost kid. The conversation died there.

A few steps forward, the kid began to bounce on Chitanda's arm, making her immediately hold him tighter fearing he would fall. This brought her gaze back up. Since he wouldn't stay still, she decided to put him down without letting go of his hand.

"Papa! Papa! Papa!" The child began to repeat unceasingly, shaking up and down, trying to walk faster.

From one second to the next, his tiny hand slipped through Chitanda's fingers. At that moment he began to run at the best of his ability, while he wasn't fast, he was sneaky and soon mixed into the dissipated crowd. Chitanda immediately rushed after him.

It might have been inconsiderate on my side to keep the same pace and just watch from behind, but the kid didn't go far before a man, who looked beyond desperate, turned around and got to him faster than Chitanda could.

"Xiao!" He immediately shouted, smiling but looking complexed between relief and a sudden need to cry.

At my own speed, I got to Chitanda as this scene took place. She turned around and I couldn't tell if her expression had completely brightened up since she looked dumbfounded.

The presumed parent kneeled down in front of where we stood, immediately wrapping his arms around the child. When he stood up, he held the kid tightly against his chest, his hands trembling and eyes closed as he spoke in a fast, uncontainable whisper.

 _« Thank you. Thank you. Thank you »_ His lips seemed to make out those words over and over again.

As he was making sure his child was alright, Chitanda approached him subtly. When his eyes met hers, it didn't take him more than a second to grab her wrist and bow deeply, even when still carrying the child.

"Thank you for taking care of my son."

Her body seemed to go stiff at this sudden gesture, and her expression became somewhat awkward, or beyond that, completely startled. The man let go of her after a short moment and proceeded to answer the " _How_ " that was probably building inside Chitanda's mind.

"I was just told that a young miss was looking for a child's parents. I immediately knew it had to be my Xiao." He spoke fast, holding his breath behind a big smile.

"What a relief." She finally softened her expression, offering a kind smile.

"Thank you, too, Sir." He shook my hand firmly. I too was taken aback, just like Chitanda had been a second earlier.

Although, I felt burdened the few seconds he stared at me since I barely did anything for his son.

"But I beg you let me treat you, it is after all the very least I can do."

"Pardon?" Chitanda asked.

"I own a small restaurant, I'd be more than glad to offer you a meal." His faltering breath and gummy smile were past despair and showed instead an overwhelming degree of enthusiasm.

Chitanda's eyes blinked fast and turned to me, as if asking for an opinion. I was surprised as well, but my clueless response consisted of my shrunken shoulders.

"It's really nearby." He insisted.

In the end Chitanda gave in, but also dragged me along since she assumed I was fine with her decision. Although I didn't have anything against this man, who looked just a couple of years older than us, I wasn't one to openly trust anyone I'd just met. Chitanda on the other hand, soon developed a conversation with him as we walked out of the market.

Pleasantries were exchanged and we learned that his name was Măo, that his son, Xiao, was a little over two years old, and that they were Taiwanese.

After walking out of the market for a few minutes, the streets started to seem narrower and although they were lined with stores and small restaurants, the atmosphere was a lot quieter. We passed a few of those places and finally arrived to a brightly lit establishment that held up a red board above the entrance, although I couldn't read the white characters written on it.

Măo extended an arm openly and the first one to run inside was Xiao. The place wasn't empty, a couple of the wooden tables were occupied by people who seemed to be waiting for the owner to come back as they left little after. He shook a few hands and quickly went back to us, offering us to sit at one of the tables.

"Please, if you may. What would you like to have?" He asked in a bright manner.

"Just a cup of tea would be more than enough, we shouldn't stay for too long." Chitanda answered kindly but I could tell she began to feel rushed as well.

I sat next to her since the table had four chairs split on opposite halves and Măo would most likely sit in front of her. And so he did once he brought out a set of tea cups.

In the cup was some strongly concentrated black tea, but so nicely sweetened that it felt refreshing.

"I apologize for the trouble, I was arguing with a costumer and the next second Xiao was gone." He said.

"Please do keep a closer eye on him, it'd be terrible if this happened again." Chitanda didn't hold back her discomfort as she gazed worriedly at the toddler playing with a pair of chopsticks on the table.

"Yes, of course." He laughed tensely, downing his head. "It must have been difficult to get his attention since he barely knows any Japanese. Do you happen to know Mandarin, Chitanda-sama?"

"I wish I did, but I only know some basics." She answered modestly.

"Is that so? Have you by any chance ever been to Taiwan?" He asked with great interest.

Upon hearing this simple question, her lips offered a different smile, one that seemed uneasy and shy. Casting her gaze down, she answered.

"Only once." Her eyes averted for a second. "It's getting late, is it not?" She turned towards me without looking up.

"It's already past six." I added.

"Then, give me just one minute." He reacted quickly and disappeared before Chitanda said anything else.

Five minutes later, Măo reappeared from behind the counter, bearing a white delivery box with a thin metal handle. He placed it on the table and the aroma of beef and spices became stronger.

"Our treat." He smiled.

"How could we accept-" Chitanda's face reddened.

"You kept my son safe and then brought him back home. Please."

This man had an interesting way through persuasion, as his polite, overly-friendly smiles and gestures turned out effective the moment Chitanda dropped her shoulders, accepting his gratitude.

She took the food box as he wished us both a safe way back. Upon his father's call, Xiao put his chubby hands together and bowed while saying " _Thank you_ " as Măo did the same coordinately.

I walked out first, but Chitanda stopped at the frame of the entrance, waving joyfully at both father and son.

" _Zài jiàn_ " Was all I could understand based on the little Mandarin I'd once learnt in one of my middle school classes. On both sides, they exchanged such farewell and next we were back on a wider street, walking as the sun started to set.

…

The road was quiet and the air dyed in a washed-out crimson. Chitanda began to talk about how nice the countryside of Hokkaido was during spring and how pitiful it was to miss it out. Although this conversation had no importance or any depth, we still kept it up through short commentaries and a few nods.

At one point, she noticed the bag I had with me and asked if the book I got was good so far. Because she pointed it out, I also realized she was carrying two bags, one from the library and the other one containing Măo's treat. I answered shortly that I hadn't read much yet, and then offered to help with the package.

"Thank you." She said in a tuneful way, as though nicely surprised by such a simple gesture.

I did not take this to heartsince growing under the weight of Tomoe's lectures, being taught to be a gentleman was a must.

However, as we reached an open street, her attention was immediately captured by something that made her hurry her pace.

"How beautiful." She gasped, her voice almost blending into the whispering sound of the wind.

We were distanced from the urban core, and that something was enough proof of it. Where the street met a wide intersection, the other side crossed a river, as if dividing the natural from the artificial.

The bridge looked old for the fashion in which the pillars stood on each side. The path was wide and tiled with limestone. People walking on both directions, but just her standing still in the middle.

This was reminiscent of some other day when the sun too painted water golden.

"You have a good eye for this sort of picture." I remarked somehow instinctively.

"Do I…?" An oblivious face turned after a few seconds in that of a self-conscious realization. Chitanda leaned against the deck of the bridge, her fingers neatly placed over the limestone. "Oh, you must be talking about the old lighthouse."

"I didn't mean to bring it up." I turned in the opposite direction and dug my hands in my pockets, my back resting against the structure.

"That's okay. In fact, that was never clear." Her voice suddenly became inquisitive. "I knew I saw you there, but when you told Maya-san something different, so I thought I was better off following along to not cause you more trouble."

"I was actually lost back then, so it wasn't a complete lie."

"Is that so?" She laughed gently. "The first time I visited that place I was lost too."

"How come?" Again, another reflex of mine after three days of holding this sort of mundane talks.

"Let's see… As you already know, my family is from Kamiyama City, so when I first moved over to Yokohama, I wasn't familiar with it at all. One of those days I ended up wandering far from home."

She retrained herself a little, still touching the stone deck. Looking down at the reflection of the sun over the stream of water, she began to tell a deeper story.

"When I was in high school, I signed into the Classic Literature Club, which wasn't very popular at the time. The clubroom would usually be empty, and whenever I was by myself in there, I met true peacefulness. Especially at the sight of a sunset right behind the mountains."

"Many years later, I found that same feeling. I could see the sun setting from the exact same angle. But instead of mountains, you can see the ocean… "

"Kamiyama High School's buildings were old fashioned, just like that tower. I'm certain they were renovated little after I graduated, and I think that sooner or later, the lighthouse will turn into something else as well. So I enjoy being there every now and then, it is quite soothing."

Even though her story had no real meaning to me, I still listened to her words attentively. After all, I did not have anything to say.

"I'm sorry to bore you with this." She straightened her back. Her face had a rosy tone to it and her smile was shy.

I shook my head briefly.

"It seems the only way into that place is by accident."

"Does that mean… no one else knows of it?"

"I've never seen anyone else go up there. I've never talked to anyone about it either. I cannot tell if I simply never saw the need to, or if I did keep it as a secret." Her eyes looked upwards and then back down." Well, I suppose it can no longer be called a secret anyways."

"I'll make sure not to tell anyone."

She smiled but didn't say anything else until a cold breeze brought a shiver to the spine. She breathed in deeply, her shoulders shrinking, then diverted her eyes back to the disappearing sun.

" _Isn't spring refreshing?"_ I heard her mutter, or at least that's what her lips seemed to mold out.

Perhaps, I realized, it wasn't possible to avoid her, but it didn't feel necessary.

 _« Indeed it is. »_

…

Mao's gift turned out to be a family-sized meal, thus, we had beef noodles, some soup dumplings and a few side dishes for dinner before heading over to the last meeting. The last event ended at ten and three hours later we were back on a plane.

Chitanda reminded me of taking the pills she'd gotten right after the flight ended. They weren't miraculous, but they helped getting through the way back on my own.

…

I pitied Chitanda, who even after a nighttime trip, still had to attend her office the next morning. But I was feeling less miserable since Sawakiguchi spared me the day in compensation for a sacrificed Sunday. I felt determined to enjoy of a healing rest.

Three knocks at the door and those plans crumbled down.

"You changed identities too or just the address?"

"How did you get here?"

"Don't you mean _'thank you for not letting me die a loner'_?"

His hand patted strongly my shoulder, then he jumped out of his shoes and proceeded to prowl inside my modest apartment.

…

While he was over, he told me Mayaka had found out about my new job and got upset since I never reported back to them.

Even through his playful tone and bad jokes, it looked as though he felt deceived, as if he hadn't been included in the entire process. I knew how badly he hated to be left out, so I tried to make it clear that nothing to special had happened, to convince him of that being the reason why I never said anything over the past four months.

I never mentioned couple of incidents I had run into with Chitanda. I didn't feel the need too, and I felt like I didn't have the right to either. Instead, I talked to him about the unexciting events at the office.

* * *

A few notes:

\- Hey, guys! I'm back with a little something, but not with a face to show since I'm really embarrassed for making you wait this long :( -

-I _had_ to make Xiao foreign because it plays a triggering role in the future *shh*. I really apologize if this seemed inaccurate to the Taiwanese culture. Also, everybody here is meant to be speaking Japanese but it's written in English, so which language should I switch to when they speak Mandarin? I just Romanized it *?*

-A bit of a warning: Houtarou gets cheesier with time, so just wait a little more for the romance to come your way ^^

I swear I'll bring to you a bribe hehe~

I'm still re-shaping it(for the nth time) so it'll be here when chapter 5 is up! I hope it's worth taking a look :)

And thank you so-so-so-sooo much for the latest reviews, wherever I was, whenever I got them, I felt really happy and motivated to keep on with the story!

Q: why do you think the room was suddenly unavailable? uhuhu


	5. Too Selfless

…

Transaction. _Accepted._ Loan. _Accepted._ Invoice. _Verified._

I went through it all, fast but carefully, I didn't want to be the next mistake costing the company another loss of money.

Once I was over with a bunch of numbers, I picked up a binder containing the final product of Sawakiguchi's work for the day. The next step was to take those papers to the highest floor and get them revised and signed by our young superior.

Honami let Chitanda know I was there and after a minute she let me in. I stepped inside and saw her at the desk, immersed in some reading, frowning as if trying hard to understand something.

I tilted my head as I asked:

"Should I come back later?"

She picked up her gaze quickly and immediately responded.

"Oreki-san, I didn't hear you come in." A mild grin appeared and she extended her hands to receive the stack of papers I was holding.

"Did you solve the issue?"

To these words I thought harmless, her writing became slower and her eyes seemed to lose focus, still glued to the paper under her fingers.

"You probably can't share that information. Excuse me." I retracted fast.

"You are correct… " She began slowly instead. "Here you go."

"Thanks." I said as I turned around to leave.

"Oreki-san?" She stopped me. "… Can I ask you something?"

I looked back at her and met the same gaze I had encountered in Hokkaido, the same one that held onto a riddle she wanted to solve.

"W-What is it?"

The strangest thing happened, and after a blink she went back to the same polite grin from before.

"I'm sorry, never mind." She shook her head quickly. "You may go back now."

So I did, frowning and expecting her to stop me once more. She didn't and kept herself from saying something more.

…

I went back to my cubicle pondering on her behavior. If I had to build a concept around the impression she gave off as a whole, I'd probably think of something like " _too_ _selfless._ " That sole statement lacked of an explanation, but I still pictured those words when thinking back of her demeanor rather than her words.

I pushed aside these thoughts and went about the last few things I had left to do.

…

Before I left I needed to staple some loose papers, but as I reached into the desk's drawer I realized the stapler wasn't there. I couldn't remember where I'd left it the day before, and I really wanted to check out and go home. The easiest way out was to borrow Ieyoshi's for a bit.

I wanted to leave readily since the day had been long and burdening on my back and feet. As per usual for some time by then, Ieyoshi had missed work again due to an emergency, so I had to cover up for him. I thought borrowing a stapler wouldn't be too much to ask on my side.

I had never paid attention to the things he kept on top of his desk, but since I was behind it, it was unavoidable to see.

A wooden frame outlined the picture of a child, a very little one, probably five years old, holding a red balloon with his small hands. He was smiling brightly at the camera.

Ieyoshi never talked much, he had a kind voice but a weak, almost concerning, appearance. Finding out he had a child was a surprise, however, it made things much, much clearer.

I found the stapler beside his keyboard, used it three times, and then placed it right back where he'd left it.

...

Even late at night, when my head was clear from work and all I had to do was sleep, I kept wondering what could have inhibited Chitanda to the point of seeming scared by a half-thought question.

If the problem had been solved, it meant that they found out what or who caused the incident in Hokkaido in the first place.

It wasn't about _what_ caused it, but why would someone do it. There was more to it than just a case put and solved in legal terms. Something that she tried hard to grasp but was beyond her own imagination.

…

Transaction. _Accepted._ Loan. _Accepted._ Invoice. _Verified._

I went through it all again, there was something I wasn't paying enough attention to. Something that had slipped my eye the same way it probably had in a different, very serious situation.

Still, nothing. No names, no numbers, nothing was wrong. So I looked elsewhere. Abusing my own permission to scavenge through the department's filers, I leaped through more and more papers.

Perhaps I was too confident about this plotless detective roleplay, but I still kept looking.

Whether or not it could be of any help, if it was serious enough to worry at least one person, wasn't that mystery a bit important?

That's what I thought when at last, I found something. And yet, I wished badly to be wrong about this whole sensitive, unapproachable matter.

…

Somewhere in the middle of the week, I joined Sawakiguchi for a meeting with people who came for business inside a very luxurious tea house.

After an hour of talking, we bowed down and the three men on the opposite side mirrored the gesture. Sawakiguchi offered to send them off, asking me to wait for the waitress to return. Because she wouldn't come back, I took a chance to find the bathroom and walked out of the room into the hall.

I gave a few steps forward until I reached a turn. The place was so dead silent, a mumble caught my ear. A muffled, severe yet feminine voice made a question.

 _« Why are you taking care of this? »_

 _« […] visit the child myself, it seems that he needs of specialists' care. I know yours is a private hospital, therefore it isn't covered by our health program. »_

Even like that, the soft pitch replying was familiar.

 _« We made an agreement instead of drawing in a lawsuit […] be kept under health services for three months as a settlement. »_

 _« […] can arrange a contract to fit with your program. »_

Again, everything became quiet or they talked in a lower voice that could not come through the wall. Though I couldn't hear each and every word, this was too clear for a coincidence.

 _« Our people have a health service to cover for a percentage of medical expenses. It'll make it easier on them if […] access to that service. Since […] clear of any criminal background, I can find a vacant. […] suppose anything will do. »_

 _« … I sincerely thank you. But I'm already asking for too much, Ir- »_

The last sentence was louder and therefore made it much clearer to hear the troubled honesty behind it.

 _« You are most welcome. »_ The other voice interrupted most definitively, then it continued. _« Eru. »_

A strange weight dawned heavily on my shoulders. For some reason I felt thrown back, though the severity became softer after a short pause.

« _[…] help you because I know you care too much about these issues. But you have to remember: people work for you, there's not always a vice versa. »_

Although I couldn't see her, I pictured her eyes casted down on the floor and her lips tightly closed given the quietness of the moment. Only then did I realize my ear was too close to the wall.

 _« […] given your short time in this position, it's natural, but I've been here for a while and it concerns me that you'll struggle getting used to it. »_

There was no following answer. I stopped there. I had already eavesdropped enough of something I shouldn't have known in the first place.

I continued to walk around the corner.

…

After a couple of minutes I returned to the same hall. A slim woman, almost as tall as me, walked past my shoulder in the opposite direction as I reached the turn. Her face was pale, almost ghostly white. A couple of thin, crimson lips settled in a perfectly straight line. And gaze that could cut through ice suddenly met my eyes.

I could almost feel a cold shiver reach my spine after she left.

…

Before I looked up, a stern voice I still couldn't get used to, called out my name.

"Oreki, I need to talk to you." Sawakiguchi was already back at the table.

"What's the matter?" I sat down feigning not to know what was coming.

"Be honest with me, do you know something?" She pierced through my eyes as her tone got more serious.

"About… " I held it back for a second. "… why Ieyoshi-san is no longer coming to the office?"

Sawakiguchi didn't add anything, she nodded once and that was my cue to keep talking.

"I have a poor theory of what may be happening. But it's too delicate to talk about."

"I'm all ears." She softened her expression and crossed her arms nonchalantly, her voice remained the same.

I felt rather disrespectful towards Ieyoshi, but I was cornered and had to speak my thoughts out. That, or deny everything and just seem suspiciously aware of the situation.

The reason, not the action, was the rough part to get through.

…

Ieyoshi was Sawakiguchi's right hand person, he was there to make sure things were done at her word. He was the nexus between hers and other departments' actions.

As an example, he was the one to pass on the report on the expenses of the trip. Since Sawakiguchi wasn't going, half of the reservation was cancelled because the extra room wasn't needed, or at least it seemed like it. But in the end she did have to send someone and Ieyoshi was supposed to report on that as well.

However, the updated report made by Sawakiguchi was never received, therefore the bills didn't make sense. That was the slip-up that caused a lot more trouble than just a lost hotel reservation, and it happened at the same time Ieyoshi stopped attending the office.

According to the information contained in our files, everything was in order. According to Human Resources', everything was fine _if_ only two people were traveling.

The only reason why the plane tickets were enough for all three people was because it was impossible to ask for a refund three days before the departure.

In order for this to be possible, it only took one person to make the mistake. In other words, it was something than only needed of one person to read on it but not into it. A simple paper that fooled HR but that Sawakiguchi never knew of. A falsification if I had to put it in a consistent way.

The two ends of the story did not match, and that's when invoices, accounts and things of the sort began to be tracked down.

But I was getting too ahead of myself, when things began to turn into clues months earlier.

…

Rummaging through the department files I found two different reports, months apart in date, both regarding expenses from HR, and both under a red seal reading " _denied_ "; reason: it surpassed the annual maximum credit detailed in every contract. In short, two petitions for a loan of money were rejected.

In the past month, while going through the bunch of papers that always came in for revision, I saw the same red letters only once. I didn't pay attention until a few days before we came to the tea house.

Due to confidentiality policies, these forms didn't include names, but ID numbers. From about four hundred people working in the building, the search could be narrowed by the first number. All ID series for Finance began with a 9. Both reports where filed for the same ID beginning with a 9. The solicitant was among us, and they had been rejected twice, the last time being a couple of days before Sawakiguchi called off the trip to Hokkaido.

From still a lot of people beginning with 9, anyone could be asking for a loan of money. So then, what turned Ieyoshi into the person I pictured at the top of my head?

Then there was Chitanda talking about a lawsuit and a hospitalized child.

At that moment, the image of Xiao-ping and the efforts of Mâo mixed into this puzzle.

Weren't things frightfully coincidental?

That's why I wanted to be deadly wrong and not have to tell anyone about it.

…

"I shouldn't tell you this." She began after I was done talking. "I usually work with young people, but Ieyoshi is older than me."

I paid attention to her and realized she'd stopped staring at me, like she wasn't expecting me to say anything else that she didn't already know. She leaned against the back of her chair as her tone approached a familiar ring, only somewhat duller.

"He had to interrupt college when his only child was born. Worked for a factory a couple of years before he went on to finish his major. Then he began to work with us. The kid is already ten but he inherited the same weak health of his father and it only began to show up these past months."

At that point she began to draw circles with her fingers on the table, and her voice became distant, as though she was no longer talking to me.

"I never knew of this, if I had, I could've helped approving another loan for him. But even those in HR couldn't relent his situation just a little bit and he was beyond desperate. I get it."

She looked back at me and I looked away, searching for any excuse to not say something, but my cup was already empty.

…

Long story short, Ieyoshi did change reports and falsified a few bills to mask certain quantities of money that were released by the company without Sawakiguchi knowing. While she allowed the hotel expenses to be released, he altered numbers so that HR only arranged one reservation. In the end the company spent the same amount of money reported by Sawakiguchi, but only one room was paid for.

Later on investigators found, as rumor had it, that the rest of the sum was deviated to a private account. Also, that he'd done this a couple of times before throughout the past five months, but it was never too much, just enough to pay for a few medicines and hospital hostage, I imagined.

The real problem wasn't the missing room, but the mistake that led to it since it uncovered falsification and theft.

…

Once the talk was over and we headed towards the entrance to leave, someone known was there as well.

"Chitanda-san?" I spoke lowly.

She turned her head and soon smiled as her eyes opened wider.

"Hello, Oreki-san. What brings you here?" She asked.

Instead of answering myself, Sawakiguchi showed up behind me to the same surprise.

"Oh, Sawakiguchi-san! So that's why." She stared at me for short before going back to her. "How did everything go?"

Holding her skirt as if about to do a theatrical reverence, Sawakiguchi responded with a proud expression.

"Swimmingly."

Naturally, Chitanda giggled covering her mouth with her fingers. The crazy woman always seemed to cause the same reaction on her through jokes and playful gestures.

At the end of her answer, Sawakiguchi looked at her wristwatch and a pained grimace appeared.

"Ugh, gotta run." She tightened her scarf and began to walk faster in a different direction to ours. "I'll see you tomorrow. Ciao!"

Her signature farewell was the last thing we saw before we kept on walking.

"So you met with investors, that's good." She sounded glad to remark, but the silence came back as soon as her eyes went down, following her feet.

I had nothing else to add until I realized we were walking towards the same end of the block.

"Don't you have to go back to the building?" I asked quite confused as I headed towards the subway.

"No, I have…" She took in more air but suddenly, the same way as before, chose to keep something to herself. "… somewhere else to go."

Maybe, I thought, I was making her uncomfortable by asking something she couldn't speak of. I realized I should stop making such half-hearted questions that didn't register twice before coming out.

 _I see._ I couldn't help it but to imagine what she meant, even when I knew I could be wrong.

"Have you finished your book yet?"

At first it threw me off to hear her voice regain some eagerness, but just like her tone, the mood became much lighter after taking a few more steps forward.

I caught a glimpse of her and then put my head back on the path. Curious to know, her eyes urged for an answer, but there was no overwhelming pressure this time.

"… I probably should, soon." Was my response and she was pleased to accept it after a nod.

When she stopped walking, I did the same. We had reached an intersection but the semaphore was still on green. I stood with my hands dug inside my pockets waiting to cross the street. On her side, Chitanda kept looking to the side, then her hand extended and a car approached the spot. This was strange considering she owned a car.

As the taxi pulled over, a flashback rushed into my head. The night I'd left work much later than expected was again clear at the back of my mind.

"Chitanda-san." I called while she was still in front of me.

Looking through a small pocket of my bag, I soon found what she had lent me a while ago when I needed a cab as well. I pulled the card out and gave it to her. She seemed surprised.

"So you still had it…" She focused on it for a bit. "I'll be going now. Take care on your way home."

Her head bowed shortly before she got inside the car, then she disappeared into traffic. My light turned green and I continued to follow the way to the station.

…

In the end, I understood a bit better why Chitanda was behaving strangely, even more than usual, when I asked something remotely related to Hokkaido. It felt exactly like when we were there and she wondered why a man was causing so much commotion inside a conference room.

The one big difference this time: she couldn't ask out loud. I still felt like she wanted someone's help to find the answers she needed, someone else to look at the picture and tell her where the missing pieces were.

" _You are correct."_ I remembered her slowly stating.

I couldn't intervene. Same reason why Sawakiguchi was smart enough to question me far from the building.

I just didn't need to know, yet I searched for answers I couldn't offer to Chitanda anyways.

After all, she found out on her own, not just the deceit, but the story that put it all into perspective.

…

A week passed and then everything went back to normal. People stopped whispering and the rumors died down once Ieyoshi's desk was cleared. Because he never talked much to anyone, I didn't expect them to see beyond what he did, and I too stopped thinking about it.

Well, there was a difference: Sawakiguchi seemed more stressed every time I walked into her office, and each time I was given more things to do as well.

"Sorry for putting more work on you, this is a mess." She spoke under a very remorseful smile. "Bear with me just until I find someone to do the job."

"I understand." I conceded as there was no room for complaints.

…

Once more, I found myself carrying a small stack of papers with a blank space that could only be filled by a specific name and signature.

"Chitanda-san, this is April's issue." I placed it on her desk.

"Thank you, Oreki-san."

She smiled, and I felt unexplainably apologetic, not sympathetic or more, just that.

Chitanda Eru was, by far, the only person I knew to hold such great hopes on people. That's when I wondered if, every time she was disappointed or deceived by them, she had to smile in that very same way.

" _I'm sorry."_ I muttered out of my own control, so low that I didn't even realize this thought had managed its way out.

"What for?" She asked with a puzzled expression, and her eyes focused too deeply on me instead of the printed words.

I was just as confused as her. Paralyzed and dumbfounded, I probably looked pathetic.

"For the delay, I mean." That was the fastest lie I could make up.

She looked at me, perhaps even more confused than before. Then, out of thin air, she laughed, so quietly that it could have passed off as nothing but an open, silent smile.

"You are on time, don't worry about that."

She kept on reading through the pages as I stood there, waiting and wondering if I should start getting used to this.

Still, I couldn't explain why she seemed _too selfless_ even then.

…

"Next week we're receiving a group of interns." My superior said as she left the office, always in a rush. "One of them is going to work with us, so make sure to treat him and teach him right."

"Of course." I kept typing things on the keyboard, I had a lot to do.

Sigh.

…

\- As per usual, some notes ;) -

So here it is… this is surprisingly short, sorry 'bout that c:

Also, I saw very interesting theories on the room mystery (love 'em!) sorry to let you down with what I had in mind haha it's so hard to put a mystery together, I wish I could blow your mind like Honobu does *sadface* but more will come in the future, so bear with me a little *happyface*

Interestingly enough, I heard a very (scarily) similar story to what Ieyoshi had to do, even before I finished writing it, so I felt things like these are possible and even Houtarou doesn't have the heart to just look over them.

OH and I'd forgotten about the freaking card Eru gave him, thanks for reminding of that little plot hole ^^

Thank you to those who bothered reading the whole thing in just one day and even left a review, you guys are great! *hearties* Even if you're a quiet reader, still thank you *more hearts*

\- Now onto the "bribe" thingy ;) it's quite different from this slow-paced story and it's more about the drama than a mystery. If you'd still like to check it out, it's right there waiting for you with a better explanation :) [it's T-rated because of the themes I used, nothing too strong happens so don't worry c;]


	6. Bit of Blackmail

...

Just as promised, the first Monday of May came around and a group of university students arrived at the building. Guided by the same woman who once told me where the interview room was, these people were taken to every department, even to the last floor where they met Chitanda.

At the end of the day, each one of them was assigned to a department. That's how Finance received its very own intern. Sawakiguchi presented him to some, but at the time I was off to something else, so I only learned his name afterwards.

The kid was actually eager to help, unlike me during my college years. Though he would only be asked to take care of miscellaneous things such as printing out copies, spreading memos or even picking up the mail, he'd do every little task with full enthusiasm.

"Kang Shin In?" I called out, reading his name directly from his application form.

"That's me, Sir!" He chirped and quickly ran towards me.

"Hey there." Since he seemed free, I skipped more questions. "Do you think you can help me sort out a few documents?"

"Yes, of course!" He didn't hesitate to answer with excitement.

"Oh, by the way, my name's Oreki. I work directly for Sawakiguchi-san."

"Pleasure to make your acquaintance, Oreki-senpai."

"Just ' _Oreki'_ is fine." I told him.

"Without honorifics? You are my superior after all."

"I really don't mind."

" _Noted. He doesn't mind."_ He muttered to himself. "It could take me a while to get used to that, though, senpai."

That was how we officially met.

It wasn't that I didn't acknowledge being his superior, but it was obvious that he wanted someone to look up to, and I couldn't offer him that much to learn from.

Nevertheless, Kang Shin In continued to seek out for things to do and I always needed a hand.

…

"Oreki-kun, please correct the reports on the new marketing project. Budget, incomes, short and long-term profit, everything again. Sorry, external order." Another accountant in the department said, placing a couple of files over the desk.

This sort of happenings was of no surprise since the start of May. Apparently, the project the company was preparing was due to broadcast within a month, yet, it had to go through constant reshaping too often.

But that day was different.

The building was an utter chaos. Department heads, managers, supervisors, pretty much every employee I knew was running from desk to desk.

" _The director of Marketing asked to speak to Chitanda-sama personally. She was all pale and shaky."_ Someone claimed.

"Yeah, she looked like she'd just seen a ghost. ' _Eru-sama! Something terrible happened!'_ " A second voice rushed to continue. "' _The system was hacked. Several files of the project were stolen.'_ "

That was a shame. That new project had been planned for several months. Even people in Hokkaido were investing on it.

Even as hard as everyone was working, it was impossible to prevent that sort of tragedy from coming.

"I asked Nana-san myself." Some other guy added. "She and Chitanda-sama are making a bunch of calls to try and delay tomorrow's meeting, but it doesn't seem to be working. Chitanda-sama is surely having it the toughest."

 _Chitanda?_ I thought of her and the struggle she would have to go through. It was a pitiful image what came to mind.

…

The next day at 8:00 in the morning, I checked in as usual and called for the elevator. To my bewilderment, Chitanda was already there, coming from the parking lot.

I had never seen her large eyes so tired since the time I found her crying alone in her office. Even as elegant as she looked every day, it was obvious that she was beyond exhausted. Her lips were dry, there were dark circles around her eyes, smoothened by make-up.

Chitanda had always looked healthy, until that morning.

"Good morning, Oreki-san." She greeted me with less of her usual energy and a sad excuse for a smile.

"Good morning." I pressed the button to my floor. We were the only two people sharing the lift. "How did things go?" I questioned.

She sighed.

"We managed to adjust the meeting's schedule to take care of the informatics issue for now."

"Can't you just change the due date of the project instead?" I only realized it was a dimwitted question when she looked back at me, hopelessly waiting for me to say something different. Since I didn't have any intelligent remarks, she still replied.

"The problem is that we've already done that more than enough times. The directors are not pleased with the constant changes."

"Directors?"

"Have you not heard of the Board of Directors?" Chitanda inquired with a clueless voice. I denied. "They do not make the decisions, _per se_." She tilted her head to the side. "However, they _do_ approve of them, and it isn't so easy to convince them of making changes."

"Then, isn't it impossible to approve of the project if it could be used by another enterprise?"

To these words, Chitanda thought deeply of what to say. Then, miraculously, she pressed her lips together, curving them into a wider smile.

"In the position where I am, sometimes I must push through impossible." She said. "We do not know if giving our best guarantees a solution, but we surely know that not doing anything will not solve the problem."

She looked so genuinely determined that I held back from messing up her optimism.

The "ding" of the elevator arriving to my floor was her cue to dismiss me. I stepped out of the lift, holding my glance over her for a second. She didn't look right.

…

"Senpai, have you heard?" Shin came up to my desk later that day.

"What happened?"I said without much interest.

"I just heard some people saying that Chitanda-sama collapsed."

I froze for a second and looked at Shin, making sure I'd heard right.

"What was that?"

"It seems like Nana-san found her on the floor and immediately called the doctor in the building. She was taken to the infirmary." He explained with concern. "I hope she gets well soon."

"Yeah…" I continued to think.

I had a pile of documents that wasn't ready yet to walk over to the ninth floor, it wouldn't be until the end of the shift or even the next day. But I suddenly thought it was a good excuse to find out if what Shin had heard was accurate.

Honami was there at her desk, she offered to receive what I had to hand and promised to pass it on later. Since it wasn't urgent, I said I could bring it back some other time.

"Honami-san." She hummed, still typing on her keyboard. "Is she-"

She retrained her hands from the keys, taking a second to look at me.

"Would you like to see her?" She asked instead, leaving me with no way out. But Honami looked honestly concerned.

"… I think." Was all I could utter, still unsure of staring back at her.

"I believe you could bring some peace into her mind, Oreki-kun." Honami continued to press keys, this time grinning gently.

She was probably just resting, and Honami wanted to make sure of that.

…

While I was walking back to the seventh floor, my phone began ringing. I looked at the screen and couldn't recognize the number.

" _Oreki-san, it's me, Chitanda."_

Thrown off, I raised my eyebrows but didn't answer right away.

" _I'm sorry, did I call the wrong number?"_

"It is me." I heard a sigh right after that. "Is everything fine?"

" _Of course, I didn't mean to alarm you, I-"_ She began to talk so fast that it was dizzying.

"I heard you were taken to health care, that's why I asked."

" _Oh."_ She stopped. _"Yes… they were kind enough to bring me. Although, it's nothing serious and I'm the only person in here."_

"I don't know if I should contradict you, but you did look seriously exhausted this morning."

" _I guess Nana-san thinks the same."_

"So, why did you call me?"

" _I apologize for that. The reason is… I'm just worried that something might have happened while I was in here. However, neither Nana-san nor anyone else will tell me anything. I thought perhaps you knew…"_

I didn't know what she expected me to say to her. The best I knew, or at least heard in the shape of a loud rumor, wasn't worth concerning her. It in fact was good news, but it still wasn't worth it.

"If Nana-san won't tell you, I don't think she'll like me telling you either." I admitted.

" _She believes I'll leave the room if I find out."_ A shy tone came through the speaker.

"Won't you?" I asked.

" _There's no time for lying down, there is a lot to do around here. I have to go back as soon as possible."_

"I wouldn't advise you to."

" _If everybody else is working hard, why am I here resting? I need to do something. I'm not the only one who's tired."_ Suddenly, her voice seemed upset, like talking to a stubborn kid.

"You're the only one who's collapsed because of overworking so far."

" _It's not like that…"_ She mumbled.

"Take some rest, Chitanda. You need it."

Deaf to my advice, Chitanda brought up a completely different matter.

" _Are you walking as you speak, by any chance?"_

"… I am."

" _You won't come here to meet me, will you? I wouldn't like you to do that."_

She knew I was taking my lunch break, but somehow figured out with her sharp hearing that I wasn't exactly sat down having lunch.

The infirmary was in one corner of the first floor, it had a doctor and a nurse to take care of minor emergencies within the building. However, it was an empty space most of the times. That was, in fact, where I was heading to before she caught me.

I stood still at one of the ends of the empty hallway, exactly in front of a perpendicular aisle where the infirmary was. But I didn't tell her that.

"I wasn't going to." A lie came up.

She kept quiet for a bit.

" _I won't be able to leave for now. I'll talk to you later."_

Her voice was somehow plain and suddenly stern before it was cut by a beeping sound once she hung up.

For a few minutes I stayed there, staring at the empty hall, feeling more confused than when the call came in.

As I was about to turn around and leave, I saw a woman come out of the infirmary, followed by another one who looked like the nurse. The latter said something short and soon bowed her head before returning into the room. The other woman stood there for a few seconds, nervously tapping the tip of her foot against the floor.

She turned around and began to walk away in a hurry.

I put the phone back inside my pocket and followed the same path she took.

At the end of the way were the elevators. Unable to see her anymore, I thought she'd taken a different direction.

I went up to the fifth floor, delivered some of the papers I was carrying, and then returned to the elevator. To my surprise, before it took off, the same woman, who still looked scarily anxious, appeared again almost running. There was no one else but just the two of us in there.

She was fast to press the bottom floor key several times over. Then she stepped back. It wasn't to my concern whether she was acting strangely, but I soon as I saw the ID badge clipped onto her shoulder, it became suspicious.

 _« Head Director of Marketing. Kouchi Ayako. »_ Interesting.

Kouchi was then the person who visited the infirmary. When Chitanda told me where they sent her, she also mentioned that she was there all by herself, so the nurse's attention must have been especially placed on her. Then, if Kouchi wasn't there because she herself felt sick, then she was making a visit.

As any loyal worker, there was a possibility of that being her own concern for Chitanda's health coming through. However, the sketchy feeling her suddenly ended call gave off, was the same Kouchi was carrying on her wary eyes.

When we reached the ground floor, of course she was the first one to step out. Since it would look odd if I went right after her, I didn't get off until the doors were about to close. I slipped my hand into the gap and it reopened.

She moved fast, anxiously fast, but went by unnoticed in an environment oozing with activity. She walked across the glass hall connecting the two buildings, Marketing was after all on the other side. I kept my distance.

However, when she entered the other building, she walked straight ahead until the small zone designated for the IT team. There she entered one of the offices, steady like she was expected to do so. After a couple of minutes, she came out, holding an envelope and barely smiling while greeting some people on her way.

At that point I stopped following her, it was until then that I realized I had been for far too long.

I looked around, a clock on some wall marked 12:45 p.m. My lunch break was almost over and I'd spend it wandering around two buildings out of a split hunch.

…

The next morning, as part of this new itinerary, I had some things waiting for Chitanda's approval. So I met with her and she looked much better than the day before, her skin was bright again and her eyes a bit less tired.

After she greeted me and read whatever she had to sign, she asked me to sit down for a moment. Then she tied her hands together and leaned in closer, as though to tell me a secret.

"I know now about yesterday." She began quietly. "… There are a lot of things that do not make sense."

Chitanda was an expert at unintentionally leaving me off-guard, nodding in complete confusion.

"Like… what?" I said.

"It might be nonsensical of me to say that, but-" Her head started to shake, and she closed her mouth and cleared her throat. "Um… For example, the IT team told me they are trying to track down any information leaving the building's system, making sure nothing else leaks out.

However, the Marketing department has requested several times over to delay the due date for the preliminary presentations. And I do not see the point on taking longer when this entire project is at risk of being stolen at any given chance. It- it will get worse and nobody has any possible answers, or at least matching information."

… I know you were aware of Ieyoshi-san's situation last month, and about how you figured the case out… So-"

"If." I started, regardless of her unfinished explanation. "You want me to guess, then; you don't believe that information was taken, but actually given. And it had to be done by someone inside the company."

Chitanda's eyes widened, I could clearly see myself depicted on them.

"How did you figure that out?" She asked with a thin breath.

"Because I think so too. I just cannot prove it yet."

Not only her eyes became larger, but her lips parted a little in a gasp.

"… Not a single person seems to see it this way." Slowly, her voice became keen and uninhibited, more to her nature. "It all seems so strange to me. I- I can't stop thinking about it!"

 _« I can't stop thinking about it. »_ I began to fear those words. It was like hearing a cannon shooting a projectile, announcing the imminent start of war. And Chitanda's questions were the cannonball.

"I understand that, I think." I held my hands up as she was a lot closer despite the desk placed between us. She backed down slowly. "If I help you put clues together, won't it be taking a huge risk?"

"It would. However…" Her gaze was now casted onto her hands. She spoke quietly again. "… Maya-san told me this some time ago: that it is safe to trust you."

"Those are some big words, Chitanda. I can't-" I stood up, ready to go. But she did too, refusing give up so fast.

"Even so. _I believe her_." A hint of shyness appeared when I looked up. She was too honest and made it seem so surreal.

I went through a million reasons I had to deny her, to not help her in any way that involved going out of my job. She was an adult and I was one as well, as much as a " _no"_ should have been enough to stop any extracurricular interaction with Chitanda.

But, there was a " _but"._

Flashing in some corner of my mind, I remembered something. When I was a student, I had a motto to rule out everything I invested energy into.

 _« If I don't have to do it, I won't. If I have to, make it fast. »_

Then one day I lost it just to help someone out. Being in that office in front of a wholehearted person such as Chitanda, suddenly brought back that dusty, old mantra I'd started to follow again a few months back.

Maybe I was breaking my own rules again.

"Where should we start?" I asked, not exactly excited.

One quick glimpse of her and I saw a smile, a gentle expression that lacked of any possible wrongness. So what was I to lose? Time, at most.

"Thank you." She said.

…

It was no secret that Finance had to keep close contact with Chitanda, so it didn't come off as odd when I entered her office the next day, even though I wasn't carrying any reports this time.

"Oreki-san, you are qualified to supply financial assurance, right?" Chitanda questioned while looking through her drawers.

"According to who?" I wanted to know whose opinion I was opposing to.

"Sawakiguchi-san, of course!" _Of course,_ I noted the inadequate use of the adverb. "That's what she argued when she sent you to Hokkaido." She added as it was something obvious.

Then she handed over some files, all of them related to the marketing project of the year. Full spreadsheets took over several pages, it was familiar to what I used to do working for a bank.

"Some things do not match. That was to be expected when the reports came in, but you'll see, even those seem… _odd._ "

Chitanda was careful, I realized once I opened up the documents. None of them were exactly top-secretly confidential, some even resembled the sort of work I would have Shin help out with. None of the reports was signed by her, only by a representative of the department they came from. Some were sent by Marketing, others by Communications, and a few by Finance.

She was right, I never doubted it, but I did think that maybe she was exaggerating. Things weren't clear from one thing to the next, for the most part, Marketing's files were altered and justified the discrepancies by going into meaningless details as an escape goat.

Reading everything was confusing at times, but in the end Chitanda was still right, she just didn't know how so.

Once more, I had dived knee-deep into the whole mess, so it was too late to get out, when I myself felt quite close to finding out her answer, even when she couldn't put together the exact question.

"I have decided not to delay the conference next week." Chitanda added, looking uneasy with her decision but determined to follow it.

…

We met a couple more of times, when she had a few spare minutes and I had a few words to say. One of those days she remembered to tell me:

"The day I was in the infirmary, someone came in... However, that person wasn't there to see _me_ , she only asked about my expedient. When I saw her, she immediately retracted and instead wished me to get well soon. And then, when she was about, she mumbled something strange… like:

' _Don't look too far, we're almost there.'_ What do you believe that meant?"

I had a vague idea, but it came along later.

…

Chitanda's words were followed suit the week after, when several interested executives attended the conference Kouchi was directing.

About five hours before the event started, Chitanda and I were, out of coincidence, walking through one of the halls in the seventh floor. She looked as usual for the most part. What wasn't natural on her that morning, was the worry heavily planted on her expression.

"Did you sleep well?" As an expert in the matter, I asked.

"Yes, of course." She almost mumbled.

"Then… are you nervous?"

"Not exactly. I know we can handle this… The project will launch this summer, I will make sure of that." She strengthened her tone.

I didn't have anything else to say, not to her.

…

Despite Chitanda's concern, the conference was successful, surprisingly so.

Marketing put together the best out of the unfinished project, leaving a few missing details to the air, but they seemed so insignificant and easy to fix that not a single person in the audience questioned them.

When it was over, Chitanda and Honami, who had a lot more of people to meet, were fast to leave. There was no chance to tell her what I had in mind, not that she would like it.

On the sixth floor, as in most of the others, was a small room with a coffee machine, a water dispenser, and a few cabinets. As most people were still busy inside the conference room, the coffee room was empty. Except for the one person who was free enough to refill her cup, Kouchi Ayako.

She walked lightly, a lot different from the week before when Chitanda had been taken to the infirmary. Kouchi entered the small room.

I walked up to her, and when she heard someone else entering the place, she turned around.

"Oh. Excuse me, help yourself." She spoke nonchalantly and then walked past me while holding her coffee.

"Kouchi Ayako-san?"

She stopped.

"Yes?"

"About the new project." I continued.

"It succeeded. Thank you." When she faced me, her tone was the same, but her chin was up and her chest puffed.

"I didn't come here to congratulate you."

She seemed offended to my words for the way she smiled incredulously.

"I heard, even saw, some things, I put them together, and I would like you to confirm them for me."

"I have no time for this." She swung on her heels.

"Then I'll keep it short, but I beg you to help me out here since I'm not a fan of speculation." Though I meant to spend the least time possible dealing with her, I didn't rush a single word, nor was I desperately trying to get her attention.

Once more she stopped, and as she turned around with an unpleased expression, I stepped forward.

"You either work for someone outside, or really want a higher position. If it's neither, I shall apologize." I dug my hands in my pockets. "But I've got a feeling it's actually both."

"Huh?" Kouchi exhaled, a sickened, clear sound of exasperation came from her before she tried to say something more.

"Okay, I suppose you want me to explain." I took a deep breath, she barely moved a muscle. "After all, who else would dare suspect from the Marketing Director herself?"

Kouchi was progressively getting annoyed judging by the way she attentively placed her upset glare on me.

"Why throw away months of hard work in one snap?" She asked in a bitter crackle, but she didn't look too confident.

"Because you had bigger plans. And also, that work wasn't exactly _'thrown away'_." I looked at her straight in the eye. "Files were traded."

Her jaw and neck stiffened, but in an attempt to play it off, Kouchi looked away. She seemed a bit uncomfortable, but I wasn't done talking.

"Every new 'adjustment' to the project seems like a way to hide original files and get a higher budget. That means, rearranging everything with different numbers. And then, leaking them out of the system into a rival company? That seems like a bit of a stretch. Sure, it sped up the launching as it was the safest thing to do. But that wasn't what you wanted, right?"

At every word, Kouchi's hands clenched harder the cup between them, so much that I thought she'd end up crashing it before crashing my skull for everything I was saying. Still, I didn't shut up there, although she wasn't going to like what was next.

"Kouchi-san. The rumors, they are a lie, aren't they? There was never any leaked information. That's what IT was doing for you. Hiding the track of _stolen files._ "

Amidst her nervous and bitter laughter, she suddenly stopped. "Are you trying to play the detective here? Wh-Where are you getting all of this from? Do you realize-?" Then her eyes squinted and she frowned, obviously more upset every second. "You…" She took a close look at me. "I've seen you before on an elevator. Were you following me?!"

"I might have." Even though I knew my plain voice could be misinterpreted as cynicism, I couldn't control that at times.

"I could report you, even sue you for harassment, defamation, aggravation. Should I go on, Sherlock?" She rose her three fingers before me.

I tilted my head.

"Do you wish to talk about legal charges?" I honestly, respectfully asked. "Because what I presume you did would result interesting to more than a few lawyers."

Kouchi kept silent, analyzing me from head to toe. I thought it was time to pull out one or two things I'd learnt from Morishita a while back. So I inhaled deeply and took a step back.

"Let's say you _'hid'_ confidential information. That could mean the misappropriation of the classified files you had full access to, as it was your responsibility to secure the project's confidentiality. Also leading to charges for endangerment of resources." I continued after a short pause, when her attention was fully on those words. "Last but not least, and where the outsider comes in: _inside trading._ Should _I_ go on, Director?"

Her eyes opened widely and her lips began to separate in awe.

"But everything got out of your hands when Chitanda collapsed…" A thought slipped my tongue, the same one that ran down my arm when I began clenching my hand.

« _Don't look too far, we're almost there._ » I remembered Kouchi told Chitanda. By ' _we'_ , she didn't mean anyone inside the company. That must have been when Chitanda started to feel uneasy with everything related to the project.

A sound, not too loud, took me out of that reminisce.

Kouchi had clasped her hands against her mouth, her eyes were bright and wide open. She hadn't been able to jump back when the cup fell onto the floor, splashing hot coffee over her feet. Good thing she was wearing boots and the cup was a thermos, so the noise wasn't as loud as to drag much attention other than mine.

I never thought things would go as far, but I had to finish what I'd come to say. Just so I could find the right answer.

"Why…? I could get you fired. So why do you this? Is it for a bribe? If so, how much did you expect-?" Kouchi stammered a bit as her body trembled.

"You are mistaken. I don't do anything that isn't worth my effort. And I told you I'm just guessing." I crouched down to retrieve the empty cup. "I'm not going to tell on you."

"Then-" Her lower lip began twitching.

"You will." It was a clear statement.

She stared at me quietly, her eyes bright as about to tear up. Because I'd seen Chitanda's confused expression far too many times, I knew from experience that I had to explain myself

"Chitanda-san is neither blind, nor stupid, she'll figure it out. And I can see you feel guilty. So, if I'm allowed to suggest, you should come clean before her. Unless you prefer me to." I handed over the cup, she took it almost automatically. "I'm sorry about the coffee."

" _So which one is it?"_ Kouchi smiled sadly, looking at the puddle of coffee under her feet.

"Huh? I told you, I think it's both." I bowed my head as a farewell and continued to make my way out.

Before I crossed the door's frame, something a bit louder than a whisper reached my ears.

" _Who are you?"_

"If it is of any use, my name is Oreki Houtarou."

I left without looking back at her, she'd already had a tough time and the answers were clear enough.

If it had been Chitanda the one to confront Kouchi, I was sure she wouldn't use any sort of blackmail. But that was all I could do.

…

I never told Chitanda about meeting Kouchi, much less about the things I said inside the small coffee room in front of Marketing. All of my hopes lied over Kouchi's honesty at least towards her.

A few days passed before I saw Chitanda again, mostly because she'd been out of town for a while. Then the routine restarted and something else had to be taken to her office in the name of Finance.

At first everything was normal, she was in a hurry, so she took the papers and got up, ready to leave for a meeting. Since I was to leave as well, we came to the door at the same time.

Before I pulled the handle, I felt her hand gently pressing on my shoulder a couple of times. Hesitant at first, I glanced over.

Chitanda was standing there, wearing the most peaceful expression I'd seen in what felt like ages.

"Everything is clear now _._ " She took a pause, then a whisper followed a smile. "Thank you, Oreki-san."

Though I opened my mouth, it wasn't able to articulate any words. Neither did I remember to open the door, as she reached out for the handle I was still holding, bringing me back to all senses.

"Eru-sama, the meeting room is ready for…" I heard Honami speak as soon as we stepped out of the office.

…

At last, the company successfully managed to launch their new promotion campaign by the time summer's hot days arrived. It was on the last week of June that everything fell into place. The building was still a perfectly organized chaos, if there was any way to call it.

Shin continued to help and follow me around. On that note, Sawakiguchi was still a mess, she put the search for an assistant at hold, even more so when Shin became of great help.

…

One day, because Shin had proven to be quite good at his multitasked job, Sawakiguchi asked me to take him to Chitanda's office at least once so that he could see what I had to do whenever I met her.

We did as requested, however, while I was talking with Chitanda about the papers we were holding, Shin stayed back, too stunned to move or say anything.

When Chitanda looked at him with a kind smile on, I followed the direction of her gaze. His jaw dropped slowly and his pupils enlarged as his eyes started flickering. For the time I'd known Shin, I had never seen him that nervous, he wasn't the shy kind.

"Do you have something you'd like to say?" Chitanda questioned as though she was speaking to a child.

"N-Not really." He stuttered.

"… You must be Kang Shin In-san, one of our interns, right?" She kept on.

"Do you really remember that?" Shin was amused.

"Of course!" Chitanda smiled even more. "Although it's a shame I don't get to see our interns more often, I'm sure it's a sign of your hard work."

"Thank you." Shin replied, bowing several times over.

"Let me add, and I hope not to be rude by saying this; but your accent is really enjoyable." She complemented, immediately igniting his usual excitement.

Because Shin's application form stated that he was from Korea, I didn't feel the need to ask about his name. However, my senses were not as sharp as Chitanda's, so I couldn't detect much of an accent that, judging by Shin's joyful response, in fact existed and he was proud of.

"Do you really think so?" His smile was much wider. "Actually, I'm half-Japanese on my mother's side, but I've lived in Korea ever since I can remember."

"That is so interesting! How do you like it here so far?" He was more than happy to tell his story, and Chitanda was easily charmed by his aura.

But we had things to do.

"Hate to interrupt, but we have things to do." I cut in.

He went back to his quiet posture while Chitanda returned her attention to the papers.

"Chitanda, I'll take the annotations back to Oda-san." I began to speak, she was fast to nod.

After that Shin and I were back at our department, but he couldn't stop talking about Chitanda.

"Chitanda-sama looks like an angel. And to think you get to see her so often!" He gasped with his eyes on the ceiling. Then he looked at me. "By the way, are you and her close?"

"I don't think so, why?"

"You called her _'Chitanda'_ the entire time. Or is it that you're both the same age?" He shook his head immediately, driving a finger to his chin. "Still, she's our superior…"

 _Ugh._ "That's the deal with honorifics, I always drop them after a while. I'm not good with manners." I told him, trying to get rid of his interest, but failing in the end.

"But she looks comfortable with you, senpai."

When he said that, I went through the times I'd heard people call out Chitanda's name. There was always a title for her, either Chitanda-sama or Eru-sama for the most part.

However, at some point I stopped addressing her like a superior, or maybe just not like a stranger anymore.

…

"Does it bother you when I call you _'Chitanda'_?" I decided to find out one day.

She shook her head softly. "If you're comfortable with that, it's okay. However, I've been meaning to tell you that you should be careful around others. I wouldn't want anyone to misunderstand you."

"You sure?" I pressed on.

"I am. It feels like… like we can be friends."

She looked away, almost sheepishly trying to take some weight off her words. I felt my face growing warmer, but… maybe, it wasn't so bad.

 _Right?_

…

This is a long, wordy one haha. Sooo~ there's that :) hope you enjoyed!

Now, I know updates are inconsistent, and I'm always sorry for that :( So just look at the story like something to read whenever you have a free few minutes every now and then :) I hate to keep you waiting! :(((

Also, we all NEED more HoutaEru and I'mma make sure of that (soon ;)! So, please bear with a couple more chapters that I need to build up the relationship and add up more time, I wish I could make them fall in love at first sight, but I want to respect their characters as much as possible hahaha

Until the next chapter, see you! *hearts*

* * *

*Teeny-tiny update: I apologize, you're right, "Eru-sama" _is_ too much for Shin (he's young and friendly, forgive us). I'll leave that title just for the people who are older than Eru and have known her for way longer (e.g. Honami, Sawakiguchi, etc.) :) Thank you for letting me know of that slip-up.

Again, sorry if the use of honorifics wasn't adequate.


	7. Friends of Ours

…

It was rainy. _So rainy._ August had been pouring out of season.

And I still stood under a semaphore at some intersection in the middle of Tokyo. I had been delaying the trip ever since Tomoe called one morning saying that there was a package for me retained at a Tokyo post office, so I had to pick it up from there. But then I got a message from the post office giving me two more days to pick it up or else they'd send it back.

So there I was one Saturday, carrying a flat box inside a plastic bag, standing under a cheap umbrella and watching the rain blur out everything four feet away from my eyes.

I heard the sound of the pedestrian's signal go off and began to walk, there were still many more blocks before the subway station I was heading to. In the middle of the street, a different sound started buzzing. It was my phone.

I picked up once I was at the other side of the street. "Hello?"

" _Oreki-san, hi."_ The other voice, much too recognizable, spoke.

"Oh, Chitanda, what is it?"

" _Have you heard from Mayaka-san?"_ She went right ahead.

"Mayaka? No. Why do you ask?"

" _You see, two days ago I was going to meet her in Tokyo, but she cancelled it. I was waiting for her to call, but she hasn't. I've been trying to get in touch with her today but she does not answer any of my calls._ _"_ She exhaled in dismay. She sounded a bit worked up.

"She probably just has work to do. Why are you so worried?" I asked, much less agitated than her.

" _Because… when she called to cancel, she did not sound very well."_ Her voice became smaller. _"I thought you might know if she's alright. Maybe from Satoshi-san?"_

"I don't see why Mayaka would talk to me if she isn't answering you. But… Satoshi has been too quiet lately, now that you mention it." I pondered.

" _Do you think they might have had a fight?"_ Her voice dreaded.

That was a possibility, but it wasn't usual and certainly not always this concerning. Chitanda most likely wasn't used to that after all.

"I don't know." I replied. "If they did, I don't think we should be meddling. Let's just wait until either of them mentions something."

" _You're right. I hope they are just busy these days."_ Her voice came to a mutter.

"I'll check on Satoshi, if that's of any help."

" _Would you? If anything happens, can you please let me know? I'd like to visit Maya-san, but I'll be patient."_ Chitanda immediately seemed to cheer up a little, but then she went silent for a few seconds. _"Is it raining where you are, too? It has been for hours here in Tokyo."_

 _Go figure._

"I should know, I'm crossing downtown right now."

" _Is that so?! I came around for a few errands, that's why I thought of visiting Maya-san in person!"_ She chirped.

I left Chitanda talking alone for a moment and stopped at a corner. The rain was too heavy to see clearly across the road, but a similar silhouette to hers was there, holding up a phone against her ear. Coincidences were starting to get ridiculous.

To prove whether or not it was Chitanda, I asked:

"Let me guess… Are you at a bakery shop called _'Tous Les Jours_?'"

"… _Oreki-san, how could you possibly know that?"_ Her breath drained in awe.

"Because I'm right across the street."

From my perspective, the silhouette began to swirl around inside the shop, coming up behind the window I was facing. Then she started waving excitedly.

It surely was Chitanda.

" _This is fun!"_ She sniggered, ever so daintily. _"Wait a minute, I'm almost done here. I'll meet you outside."_ She rushed away from the window.

I crossed the street and stood before the establishment, a bit awkwardly but not for long. Soon she walked out. From afar all I could distinguish was her raven black hair and a beige dress; also, she was taller than the average, so that hinted too. However, from up close, her picture was as clear as day. Her long hair was neatly tied in a long, waving tail, with her bangs still outlining the soft curves of her face. And what I thought to be a dress, was actually a quite stylish raincoat. Being Chitanda, it was only to be expected. She was elegant even in nature.

She opened a peculiarly red umbrella, one that resembled the traditional attire for festivals, with lotto flowers, a few floating leaves, flying birds and a blue butterfly, stamped onto the fabric.

"Hello, again!" She smiled brightly, stepping down the stairs of the entrance. "Where are you heading?" She asked once we were at the same height, our umbrellas a centimeter away from each other, so there was no water intercepting my vision of her anymore.

"Shinjuku station." I answered automatically, surely sounding and looking quite dumbfounded.

"That's awfully far, Oreki-san." Her eyebrows pursed behind the thin locks of black hair, her voice troubled.

"Yeah, I forgot to tune in on the weather report this morning." I shook my head, getting rid of the dazed look on my face.

"I could take you there." She was eager to say. "I parked the car in a lot around the next block."

"Don't you have somewhere else to go?" I asked, though the offer was tempting, as I didn't want to get soaked through the who-knows how many more blocks I had to walk.

"Not anymore. I was just buying some pastries. I promised to take a few treats back to Kamiyama City tonight." Chitanda looked at the paper bag on her hand, excited over its contents.

"If it really isn't any trouble for you, then sure." I responded to her offer, sparking a glad smile on her face.

We began walking along the sidewalk and it didn't take her over a minute to say something else, especially since she was curious.

"What about you? What brought you here, Oreki-san?"

"This." I pulled up the plastic bag containing the package. "My sister sent it, but I have no clue of what's inside."

"How exciting, a surprise!"

She beamed and her eyes twinkled despite the lack of sun. But mine were as gray as the pavement ahead of us. I couldn't relate.

"You don't know my sister. I can't really trust a mystery box that much if it's from her. It could be a cursed book or a dissected animal for all I know." I grumped.

"Let's hope it isn't." She chortled, looking at the box with warm eyes, probably wondering what could possibly hide in there.

Still, she dropped the subject a few steps forward, and instead returned to what was keeping her heart in trouble.

"Maya-san tends to overwork when something's bothering her." Her eyes switched to her feet, so low that I wasn't able to see them. "I'm still thinking about that, because she usually forgets to take care of herself during tough times."

"I told you it probably isn't that big of a deal." I tried to help her shrug it off as I did. All she did was grin before bringing up a question.

"You have known Mayaka-san and Satoshi-san for quite a long time, right, Oreki-san?"

"More than I'd like to, yeah." I shrugged.

"How did they use to be?" Her face brightened up a little, anticipating an answer.

I didn't give it much thought before I spoke.

"Mayaka has always been the same: bossy and straightforward, even her height hasn't changed much. Satoshi, on the other hand, has matured a lot since college. He was the happy-go-lucky kind up until high school, but I guess he changed because of Mayaka."

She hummed, seemingly picturing them with her eyes now looking forward.

"That reminds me… I don't really know how it is when Satoshi-san is upset. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen him get angry." She remarked with amusement.

"Satoshi always tries to be charismatic, but he has his temperamental moments every now and then, more frequently than you'd expect." I replied and she nodded slowly, a little surprised to my words.

Suddenly, she giggled quietly.

"They seem like a match made in heaven, do they not?" Chitanda sighed tenderly.

"In heaven?" I scoffed as my eyes rolled back. "I'd say in the pit of the abyss." She giggled again, and then made another question.

"For how long have they been together?"

"Um…" I put some effort into remembering the time when they stopped playing break-up-make-up, and finally stuck together. "They were already close since high-school, but didn't date formally until nearing the end of college."

"They waited for that long?" Chitanda's eyes widened in shock. "But they seem to love each other so much!"

"That doesn't rule out the fact that the two have difficult personalities. Even they forget how to handle the other from time to time." I grumped, recalling the hard time they'd always give me with every argument.

From nowhere, as it was Chitanda who started the conversation, she began to let out her thoughts in a calm, meditative voice.

"If I ever love someone that much." She began. "I think I would try to make them happy despite all of our differences. It seems like those two found a way of working together after all."

"You have to take in count your own happiness, too." I added, maybe more unaware of my own thoughts than of hers.

"Wouldn't making the other one happy, bring happiness in return?"

Chitanda raised her head, turning with a thoughtful expression but in the end smiling again before directing her eyes elsewhere.

 _Who knows?_ I thought I mumbled, but I was sure I didn't make a sound.

Things were quiet except for the constant splattering of the rain, until we turned around a corner just one block away from the parking lot. And it was then when things turned upside down.

A sudden blizzard snatched both of our umbrellas away. Chitanda's got caught in the branches of a tree on the sidewalk. While mine… mine flew all the way to the middle of a fast lane. Next thing we watched was a couple of cars running it over, bending it until it was unrecognizable.

"Oh, no!" I heard Chitanda gasp, then her hand grabbed my arm so I wouldn't get too close to the avenue. I could barely see with the wind directing water towards my eyes.

Finally, a moment after, the fury was over. A heavy, drained out of all credibility, frustrated sigh came out of my lungs.

I reached for Chitanda's umbrella first, a bit pointless as our heads were already damped. Then I ran across the street when there weren't any cars passing by, to pick up the useless skeleton of what used to be an umbrella, soon to be a piece of trash in a can. At least it was a cheap one.

"Oreki-san, I-I'm so sorry." She stammered.

"It wasn't your fault." I sighed.

"We're almost there." Her optimistic nature soon returned to her voice. "I must have another one at the back of the car, I'm sure!"

We had to walk under her red umbrella, which I offered to hold myself since I was taller. But the space was narrow, and the rain was too heavy to let us move too comfortably, so it felt cramped and rather awkward all the while.

Once we found the parking lot and were safe under the roof, Chitanda opened the doors and trunk of her car, desperately searching for another umbrella. No such luck.

But that didn't stop her empathetic nature. She swayed the handle to get rid of the excess of water, then she placed her red, and only umbrella over my free hand.

"I'll be fine, you don't have to-" I tried to return it, but she held it in place decisively, the same way she held that one card months earlier.

"This rain will not stop until tomorrow. Are you planning on waiting until then to go home? Or do you prefer to drench yourself and catch a cold?" She nagged, that sympathetic voice of hers still coming through a smile. "Feel free to borrow it, I'll be inside the car until I get home, so don't you worry."

I accepted her loan. But why did it have to be so brightly red?

…

We entered the white vehicle, the inside was impeccably clean, with black lining and a fresh sent, one that suited Chitanda, subtle but nice. It was quite comfortable, but I found myself sitting stiffly as I'd never been inside a car with just Chitanda. I fixed my eyes on the front window, and a thin hand appeared in front of me, a little towel hanging from its grip.

Chitanda looked at me, urging me to grab the piece of fabric. I did, but it didn't occur to me what she was expecting for me to do. I snapped out of my dimwittedness once I heard a small chuckle, thin and muffled by the hand over her mouth.

"Do you prefer your hair to be soaked, Oreki-san?" She asked, a hint of playfulness in her voice.

 _Ugh._ I grunted as I shook my head. I began to rustle the towel over my head, running it through my hair. I had forgotten to give Chitanda a proper answer, and it seemed unexpected to her.

"I didn't mean to make fun of you, I-" She quickly refrained her smile.

"What are you talking about? You just took me by surprise, that's all." I uttered with a mild smile, fast so she wouldn't apologize over something so childish. "Aren't you supposed to dry your hair as well?"

She laughed once more behind her fingertips.

"You are right."

Chitanda had another towel identical to the one she'd offered me inside a compartment of the dashboard. She took it and gently pressed the fabric against her head, careful not to make her deeply dark hair too messy. A faint redness lit up her cheeks, and I realized I had been looking at her the entire time and it probably made her feel coy. I turned elsewhere, my own face burning, and kept busy with my own hair.

Once done, I handed over the folded wet towel. She placed both of them back in the compartment, luckily the lining wasn't made out of fabric, so the water wouldn't cause trouble.

"I knew these would turn out to be useful on a day like this." She added with a grin. "I'll dry them once I get home."

The atmosphere became easy again once she started the car.

While driving, Chitanda kept asking random questions about young Satoshi and Mayaka. I told her a few stories that seemed to entertain her; about the time Satoshi entered a fashion club and put together absurd costumes he would shamelessly wear; about Mayaka's bad temper scaring away every kid that ever tried to confess his feelings for her to the point of making them tremble.

Chitanda enjoyed every single one of them, claiming that neither of the two had ever told her about these embarrassing – " _yet endearing_ ", as she would rather call them- tales.

I was surely going to get my head smacked if Mayaka found out I was spilling out her secret past; and Satoshi would probably come back at me telling mine. But something in Chitanda's graceful, hushed laughter kept the words running out of my mouth.

She promised to keep it a secret. She even forced me, the infiltrated informant, to swear it would stay locked between us. So I did.

About fifteen minutes later, we reached the Shinjuku train station, and as foretold by Chitanda, the rain was still as horribly heavy as before, if not worse.

"Drive carefully, the streets are going to be too slippery tonight." I warned her as she pulled over.

She hummed with a nod and a smile.

"Oh! You should try this!" She stopped me before I stepped out of the car. Next, she left a small treat, the size of a roll of tape, wrapped in white bakery paper and cellophane, on the palm of my hand. "That bakery makes the sweetest treats!"

After I ran under the roof of the entrance, holding the red umbrella on the way, she bid goodbye with a smile and a waving hand before driving away.

…

My sister's surprise package made it alive all the way back to Yokohama.

Although she'd told me not to open it just yet, I wanted to see how worth of a storm had it been for her present to be so special. So, I tore the paper wrapping apart, only to find another layer underneath. And it had something written on with black marker, undoubtedly Tomoe's messy handwriting:

 _« Seriously. Do. NOT. »_

 _Fine_ , I decided. Maybe Chitanda was right and it was better to leave it off as a surprise, even though I hated surprises.

The box fit into the upper shelf of the closet just fine, where I wouldn't have to see it lying around reminding me of the trouble it had been to get it.

As I got dinner ready, I remembered the sweet still enveloped in parchment paper inside the pocket of my jacket. I tried it then, and though it was quite tasty as it dissolved on my tongue, I'd never had a sweet tooth like Chitanda's. Sugar was probably the secret to her never-ending energy, but I didn't need that.

The cold noodles were ready by seven and I sat in the living room. On TV was a movie about some mystery-solving agency. The main character rang a bell; pale, scrawny, obnoxious and overly friendly.

I'd promised Chitanda to try and get in touch with Satoshi, so I would fulfill the task. But first I took my time to finish the noodles and the movie. Then I reached for the phone. Not getting great hopes as the background tune chimed for several seconds.

" _What's up?"_ Satoshi picked up.

"Just checking something." I started. "Is everything good?"

" _Why wouldn't it?"_ He replied, seeming annoyed by that simple question.

"I don't know. Mayaka seems upset. I mean, not her usual upset, upset. And you too, from what I hear."

"… _Well, I'm not in Tokyo right now, so I wouldn't know."_ He replied with an anxious chuckle.

"I see… So, where are you working now?"

" _You should know, Houtarou!"_ He forced another chuckle and waited for a whole minute, as if hoping I would add something else. When I didn't, he talked again, completely serious this time. _"Um… I'm around Kofu. Sorry, I've gotta go now."_ Then hung up.

It took me a while to remember that I had heard those exact same words before.

 _« You should know, Houtarou. »_

Ten years earlier, to be precise.

…

"At seven, that's okay, right?"

"Where?" I grunted, immediately regretting having said yes in the first place.

" _You should know, Houtarou."_ He scoffed before jumping off the riverside's small pillars of stone and onto the street, splashing water all over his white and green, sophomore year sneakers.

"Why would I?" I asked bluntly but received no answer as I kept my usual, lagged pace.

Fifteen-year-old Satoshi ran off, hurrying to catch the bus. "See you there!"

The only place he would visit almost as often as school, was the new arcade nearby Kamiyama High. But I checked and he wasn't there playing 8-bit videogames. I didn't plan on calling his house, there were no coins in my pocket to use a telephone cabin, anyways.

So I walked over the wooden bridge we would usually cross after school before splitting up and follow each other's way home. I figured that if it was a place we both knew, it had to be passing the bridge, so he had to cross it too at some point. It was already dark but it was the appointed time.

" _Ha!_ " A yell came from the behind me. "You actually knew!" Satoshi exclaimed, his face lit by a streetlamp above his head. He began walking up to me with both hands inside the pockets of his neon-colored, ski jacket.

"If it starts raining, I'm leaving." I warned, stopping midway through the bridge.

He looked up to the heavily clouded, dark sky.

"Then I don't have much time."

"Why did you bring me here?" I pressed on, beginning to feel annoyed by his ridiculous way of building suspense.

"Um… It's that friend of yours, Ibara Mayaka." He stopped once he was in front of me. "She tried to confess… something." His head downed.

"That she likes you?" I deadpanned much to his surprise. Satoshi's immediate reaction was to freeze while looking at me with his wide eyes. Then his face fell back down again.

" _You got it."_ False laughter came afterwards.

"So?" I stared at him, expecting a fast answer so I could leave. He did not say anything. I sighed heavily. "If you don't like her back, just turn her down." I moved my foot around as to leave; it was about to rain very soon.

"That's the thing…" His voice barely arose from nothingness. "I don't want to."

His speech lost all sense of humor, his pursed lips and his gaze down were a side of him I rarely ever got to see. He was seriously struggling there. So I stopped and turned back to my original position, gathering a bit more patience.

"Then I don't see the problem." I continued to look at Satoshi.

"I made something up and ran away before she could say much. You think she'll hate me?" He asked with a distressed expression.

Staring at him in confusion, I realized it was honestly hard for him to let out his thoughts this one time, when every other trivia topic could keep him rambling on for hours. I tried to help, but I didn't know how to. I didn't know he liked Ibara that much to begin with.

"The only two things I've ever heard Ibara admit liking are manga and you." I informed him, watching as he looked back up in surprise. "I don't know if she'll hate you, but she won't give up easily."

Satoshi suddenly looked brighter, a wide, uninhibited smile drew on lips.

"She's one of a kind, huh?" His eyes went up to the sky, reflecting the neat gray of the clouds as the brightness soon disappear. "But I'm not ready for that. She's too much and I too little." He breathed out, determined.

"Then tell her, not me." I shook my head.

"You're probably right." He smirked, a bit sadly. "But, since you've known her for longer, I thought you'd have some advice on how to do that." He confessed as his hand ran up and down the back of his head.

A droplet hit my nose, then my cheek when I looked up. Satoshi did too, then placed the hood of the jacket over his head.

"Just…" I added. "be honest. That's all I can tell you. Sorry"

…

If Satoshi was back where he had the first time he'd said that, then I _did_ know.

…

As Sunday came around, I decided it was time to intervene. I would need to travel to Kofu for a few hours, but first I found my way to Tokyo yet a second time. Sorting things out for good was my only purpose, as things seemed to have more depth than I had originally thought and disregarded.

I arrived at the apartment complex around noon. It wasn't too different from mine, except for the fact that this other one was inhabited mostly by people in their twenties.

I walked around the line of small trees separating the sidewalk from the entrance, only to spot the same pale figure amidst the same dark rain. Chitanda was walking out of the building, hiding her eyes from sight with the blackness of her bangs. Either she was keeping her face from the rain, or a gray mood had taken hold of her expression. She opened a white umbrella -I still had the red one at home-, and walked away with a fast pace.

She didn't listen to me the day before, I sighed.

Chitanda did not see me, and I couldn't exactly say I saw her all too well. I walked steady into the place and went up to the fourth floor, door 15.

With the slightest trace of will, I knocked on the door, not even twice before it was suddenly pulled inwards.

"I'm so sorry, when I said I don't want to see-" Mayaka's voice rushed, sounding remorseful. Then she looked up, surprised to find me instead. "Houtarou? What are you doing here?" Her tone changed.

"You don't want to see anybody?" I raised an eyebrow. "Is that what you told Chitanda?"

"H-How did you…?" Mayaka froze for a bit, then the discomfort crept up her face and she moved aside. "Whatever. Just come on in if you have something to say."

She walked ahead, defeated but with her head still up. I closed the door and followed her to the small living room. The place was covered in papers, most of them were sketches, others had pictures. She had been working a lot, like Chitanda had been worried about.

Mayaka sat heavily on the office chair placed in front of her desk, her back towards me.

"So, what do you want?" She spoke bluntly.

"Nothing in particular. Just looking for clues as to why you two have been this… isolated." I said calmly.

"Why do you care? Besides, you just guessed it, I don't want to see anybody right now." Mayaka still wouldn't let her pride aside.

Silence filled up the room, which was poorly lit. I spotted a maroon-colored box atop the coffee table, the center was a see-through plastic film, and inside were arranged macaroons in various pastel colors. The name of the bakery placed on one corner: _Tous Les Jours._

"So, it's that kind of situation again, huh?" I asked, well aware of my words coming off more like a statement.

Mayaka sighed, her shoulders dropped a bit lower. "I don't know what you mean, but you're probably guessing right again."

I still wished I wasn't.

"I'm now guessing I'm not allowed to make any more questions, right?"

"Very smart."

I waited for a while, sitting quietly on the small couch. I eyed a few of the items before me, wondering when had been the last time in the past week Mayaka had taken a break from work. It was a Sunday afternoon and she still enclosed herself behind a bunch of documents.

"Let me ask you something, Houtarou." Mayaka suddenly said.

When I heard her voice and hummed back for her to continue, I was expecting her to ask something about Satoshi, or even about Chitanda. But instead she uttered the same question I couldn't answer when we were younger, when I thought it would be the only time she'd speak those same words:

" _Is there something wrong with me?"_

…

About five years earlier, during college, before any of us met Chitanda, I was living in a dorm building near my Faculty, while Mayaka and Satoshi both lived in separate campuses. At the time, they'd broken up through the middle of the semester, only after a couple of months of dating.

I never dug into details, but all I knew was that Mayaka's parents were going through a tough time handling the family's economy. Meanwhile she was studying and working at the same time, trying to help to the best of her ability. Every minute of her time was packed with work until there was no space left for anything else, including Satoshi. That he couldn't cope with.

I didn't hear from either of them for a while until one night Satoshi called, half-conscious, weeping over the phone words I couldn't make out completely. He had gotten himself drunk in a bar around a subway station in Tokyo, and I had no choice but to pick him up at around eleven since he was barely standing. I took him to my dorm, where he kept crying

"She- she deserves better, I know- but- but- I- how can I help-" His alcohol-driven mouth kept sobbing. "I don't know w-why she's gotta be so stubborn. I- I never meant to hurt her pride…" He trailed off until he fell asleep on the extra futon I had laid over the floor.

I had a calculus test the next morning, the least I wanted to do was to deal with Satoshi at the time. And then something else added to the list.

"Oreki, there's a girl waiting for you downstairs." The guy from a neighbor room told me as I turned off the lights and closed the door behind me.

"I'll be right down. Thanks."

Knowing it could only be another bitter surprise, I walked down the stairs. Getting to the lobby, my guesses came to reality as I gazed over the image of a short-haired, petite girl sitting on the couch, facing the opposite side.

I walked around and as soon as she saw me, twenty-year old Mayaka stood up.

"Hey." She greeted tiredly.

"Ibara, what are you doing here?" I blinked, inconsiderate to the fact that mine wasn't the most important question considering her current situation.

She looked down, taking her time to come up with an answer.

"I needed someplace where I wouldn't be questioned." Her voice finally laid flat across the space between her and me; it was such a plain sound that it couldn't go any further. In the same way, she dropped back down on the couch, eyes still fixed on the floor.

It didn't take another word from her to know she was deadly serious, so, even as uncomfortable it was at first, I relented what she sought for: quietude.

Ibara kept her back straight, but her head was down for a while. I, sitting on the couch opposite to her, held my hands loosely tied, hanging between my knees, and my back arched. We remained like that for what felt like hours, although I knew it couldn't have been that long, the clock in the lobby was still advancing second by second, it just felt a little too slow.

"I want to take a walk, but I don't know this neighborhood." Ibara suddenly uttered, clear and upfront as she'd always been. "Why don't you show me around?"

"Sure." I agreed after looking at her for several seconds, trying to decipher the backbone of her sudden request.

It was rather simple when I looked back to it, she just needed to vent her thoughts out.

We went out of the building, the pavement was as dark as the sky itself, for it was already late into the night and those streets had very poor lighting, but at least it was a safe neighborhood. Ibara walked on my left, quietly. At some point, we reached a small park, completely abandoned under the dim light of a few streetlamps. I was the first one to sit down on the edge of the sidewalk, she followed proximately, placing herself close.

Ibara looked extremely small that night, more than usual; holding onto her legs, resting her nose against her knees, almost hiding her face completely.

"You said you didn't want to be questioned." I began, making sure my voice kept its regular pitch but with a hint of sympathy. "I thought it might mean that you wanted to speak on your own, instead."

She turned to look at me with a straight face, her eyes surely exhausted, then she went back to stare at the ruffling leaves of the trees surrounding us.

" _Is there something wrong with me?"_ She suddenly said, her voice clear despite seeming hurt but not broken.

The question lingered in the air for so long that I started to believe that maybe I had misheard it, even though I knew it came from her.

 _What do you want me to say?_ I thought of replying, but didn't do so as it was my part of the deal to remain silent, not make a question and just listen attentively.

"I mean, I spent my high-school years fantasizing about the time when he could finally accept my feelings…" She continued after her long pause, now attempting to force a grin, perhaps at how pitiful she sounded all of a sudden. But the gesture didn't surpass an unsuccessful attempt. "… but I was the one to push him away when he finally came to me… Therefore, something must be seriously wrong with me."

The only noise left behind her words was that of the cold breeze running through the leaves and branches, sweeping the dust off the ground. Mayaka extended her short legs forward, at last uncovering her face.

"So you decided on this." I concluded, unable to offer anything warmer for a response.

"I couldn't handle everything at once. So, I gave up the idea of us, since it was my biggest weakness…" Ibara acknowledged without giving it a second thought. "I don't know if I'm glad it's over, or if I'm just as miserable as I've never felt. Maybe it was too proud and dramatic of me to cut every bond keeping me attached to him, even as a friend." She finished, her voice a little less stern than before.

I had only seen Ibara shed a tear a couple of times over the course of the seven years I had known her by then, and I figured that would be the third time. But it was not; Ibara did not cry. She was calm on the outside, although it was obvious that she felt as wretched as she had claimed to feel from the inside.

Even if I did not have the best answer, I remarked on the only thing I could certainly say to her.

"Well, I'm sure Satoshi isn't the strongest person out there either, but I bet he could be of some help, at least as a friend to lean on."

She sighed, heavily like she was giving up on something, perhaps her pride.

"You know where Fuku-chan is, don't you?" She asked, looking directly at me, warning me with an ominous stare that I'd be busted if I lied.

"You're not going to like it if I show you." I answered, getting up off the ground regardless of her reaction. Though there barely was any.

"I know." She remained still, glaring ahead of her shoes. "I just need to see him."

After a short while, Ibara hoped onto her heels and we started to walk down the street from where we'd come earlier.

I did not like getting involved in something so personal for both of them, but at that moment, it was all I could do for them. So, we returned to the dorm and I took Ibara to the room where Satoshi was sleeping. I didn't pressure nor encouraged her to enter, that was her choice, and it probably wasn't an easy one.

She hesitated on turning the doorknob, bracing herself with a bit of a frown. Once there was a small gap of darkness between the door and the sill, I decided to leave them alone. I went downstairs with a book, a calculator and a pencil in my hands, trying to resume on what I was studying hours earlier.

About half an hour later, Ibara showed up before me, taking me out of the concentration I had achieved inside my calculus book. She knocked my head with her fist a couple of times until I looked up.

"I'm leaving now." She said, looking tired, but just about that, no signs of redness to know if she'd, at last, cried.

"Do I have to show you the way out or something?" I replied, confused as to what she was implying.

"Don't be rude." She knocked my head again, this time with a lot less strength. "Come on, slug."

I followed Ibara to the small porch outside the building, it was still as dark as before, but now completely deserted, as every guy was already inside their room. She stopped walking when her feet were on the sidewalk and I was still inside the property, just a few steps behind.

"… Don't tell him I was here." She asked, digging her hands inside the pockets of her cardigan. "I'll see you later."

"Sure. Take care." I complied as I watched her idly turn around. I was about to do the same and go back into the house, when a mutter barely reached my ears.

"Ah, and, Oreki…" It was Ibara, still with her back towards the house but now a couple of meters further. "… _Thank you._ "

Thin as the cold breeze that night, her voice vanished in a second, almost as if she didn't want it to be heard. I could have said something in return, but she was fast to disappear, and I wasn't sure of what she had thanked me for.

I had thought of walking her to the bus stop or near the subway station, but if she'd found her way to the house, she probably remembered the way back. Besides, she seemed to need some time alone.

…

I never knew what she told Satoshi that night, or if she just stood next to the futon, watching him lost in deep, alcohol-induced slumber. Satoshi didn't seem to remember anything either, but I noticed that somehow, he felt much better the next morning.

When I came back from school that day, miraculously with an approbatory grade in calculus, Satoshi was gone and the place was left untouched.

Mayaka and him stopped dating from then on, however, they remained close as friends. It wasn't until only one year was left of our college lives that they tried again, having a long run this time around.

It was back then, having Satoshi bundled up in one room and Mayaka statically sat in the other, when I realized that the two of them were better off together, that it would bring out the best of them. And that I would rather not see them break apart like that again.

This wasn't to say I understood how, being two completely functional individuals capable of accomplishing a countless number of things, both of them became so miserable just by being apart. But Satoshi put it in an interesting way later on.

" _You're so safe, because you haven't fallen for anyone this way."_

…

" _Is there something so terribly_ _ **wrong**_ _with me that not even Fuku-chan can fix it?"_ Mayaka rephrased her question, but her voice trailed off a little the second time.

"No, there isn't, Mayaka." I finally answered, somewhat upset. "At least nothing that Satoshi doesn't already know of." She turned around, with her tired eyes firing a weak death stare.

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?" She grumped.

"The truth doesn't always make you feel better. Besides, the same goes for Satoshi."

"Maybe it's just this very unlucky day…" She frowned after a short silence. "But you're making the most sense you have in years. _I hate it_."

Mayaka drew a long, loud breath out, clasping her hands on her tights as she got up from the chair.

"I really mean it when I say I don't want to talk about this anymore. I rather wait for him to give me an answer, then… Well, I don't know what happens next, but it won't involve you, so don't worry." Her voice switched to a softer tone, in Mayaka's scale of course. "Now go, unless you want me to kick you out."

"Good." I retorted as I made my way to the main door. "Stop working so much, you're already insane enough as it is."

"No, no, no. Wait a second!" She snapped, fast to stop me. I turned around just a foot away from the door. "You can't leave without telling me what's up with you two." She commanded, her arms crossed over her chest.

"Which two?" I cocked an eyebrow.

"Chi-chan. You." She spoke fast with the same demanding demeanor. "How did you know she was here?"

"She's not a very good liar…" I replied without much thought.

"I know she isn't." Mayaka bit the inside of her cheek.

"I saw her outside, she looked turned down." I frowned at the remembrance forming in my head. To those words, Mayaka looked completely unhappy.

"She came to see me, but I didn't talk to her very nicely. She must be thinking that I'm mad at her- _Ugh_ , I'm the worst!" Her foot stomped on the floor. Then she looked back at me with a creepy expression, squinting her eyes suspiciously. "I thought you barely knew her, why do you look so worried?"

I tried not to stammer at the sudden question but my face was probably already red anyways. "I'm not. What do you know?"

"Hmm…" She was obviously unconvinced. "Not much. But you should know, she told me about the incident with the police back in February. Look, Chi-chan hardly ever talks about her family, it's not easy for her. I can only imagine how vulnerable she must have felt back then…" Her tone became distressed but she quickly corrected it to a normal one. "What I'm trying to say is that, if she had to open up her thoughts to someone, I'm glad it was you."

Remembering that night wasn't a big deal at first, but the more I got to know Chitanda, the more unpleasant the memory became. I didn't reply to Mayaka, and she kept on talking, this time softer.

"The point is that, for some reason and regardless of whatever I told her about you, _she trusts you._ I can't understand why or how much, but I know she's not wrong to do so… Don't mess it up, Houtarou."

Her gaze softened, eyebrows pursed, but it was something I wasn't used to. So I looked away, speechless. Soon I felt her small hands pushing violently my back.

"Now you can go."

…

The trip to Kofu didn't take over two hours, and once I got there I visited my old house, where my father was still living but I didn't find him there since he was at a friends' gathering. I used up a while to settle down and let the sickness slowly dissipate. Luckily, I had slept through the entire trip, so it wasn't too strong of a headache.

It was getting dark by the time I found the old bridge blocks away from my old school, but it was only five thirty and the darkness was mostly caused by the thick clouds clogging up in the sky. The wood was still holding up strongly, but many years had turned the boards darker and molded on the underside, more than I remembered.

"I'm here." Was the only thing I said through the speaker before I found the bridge.

"… _is that so?"_ He mumbled, far from sounding surprised. _"I'll meet you there, then."_

…

Satoshi arrived a while after by foot instead of dragging a bike alongside. His hands were dug inside the pockets of a green varsity jacket.

"I knew you'd figure it out." A pathetic expression made up an excuse for a smile.

"So? What was it this time?" I rested against the deck, ready to listen to his side of the story.

Satoshi shifted on his feet hesitantly before he exhaled, ready to say something.

"I messed up. Mayaka is better off not seeing me for now." His voice, though deeper, came out weak. He then grinned in the lamest way possible. "But why, out of all people, are you the one to feel curious, Houtarou?"

"I honestly have no idea. In fact, I'm tired of playing the mediator every time you go play hide-and-seek." I sighed.

Satoshi stayed reticent for a bit, then folded his arms over the wooden deck with his eyes fixed on the water stream, flowing slowly, barely emitting any sound.

"She wants to try living together." His voice echoed, now steady and severe. "It makes sense since we barely get to see each other lately…"

"But?" I lowered my gaze, thinking about nothing, just so I could process any possible explanation he had to offer, if he wanted to. And so, he continued after another moment of dead silence.

"But… I don't think it's the best of times, with my job and hers, everything is getting kind of hectic. Yesterday I texted her, asked for some time to think it over…" He confessed as his voice vanished once more.

Satoshi wasn't a guy of staying still. He was always traveling from city to city, that's why his job suited him. He'd get easily tired of the same thing over and over. But not of Mayaka. Never of her, I knew that much.

"Is that it?" I asked after who knows how long the quietness had gone for, skeptical about his reasoning and the missing half of the truth.

He turned his head slightly, looking at me through the corner of his eye.

"Doesn't that sound like enough?" He chuckled emptily and I didn't respond. "Don't get me wrong, but I'm not expecting you to understand, you're a well-centered guy, you know-"

"Stop rambling." I cut him off. "It's not timewhat scares you, Satoshi. You can tell me, what is?"

His eyes widened slightly, then he smiled again, but this time the forced gesture irked something inside of me.

"… Is it really that easy to tell?" He mumbled, the smile quickly vanishing. "You know? I love Mayaka beyond what I might be able to express in front of anyone, even her sometimes. Waking up next to her every day… that sounds like a dream come true." He flashed a quick smile, but it fled right as he kept talking, his face quickly shadowing. "But I _know_ she's fantasizing about what it would be like. Dang it, even I am. I just _know_ it won't be so sugar-coated, and well… _I'm scared._ " His voice became quiet, almost like a sad, pitiful whisper. _"If I say yes, how long would it all last before crashing back down?"_

It didn't take long before he resumed on his monologue, never looking up.

"Sometimes I think she loves me too much, so much that I don't deserve it. So much that one day she'll be fed-up with everything I am and everything I'm not. I would never be able to stand losing her like that. Sooner than later, I'll be so scared I'll want to run away…"

I stared at Satoshi as if the deeper I did, the more I would be able to understand him. But I could only grasp one thing. When he didn't continue to say anything else and I could have sworn he had swallowed a sob, I heaved a sigh.

"When will you stop running from place to place? You used to have the will and guts to do anything, Satoshi."

Chitanda's question came back to me, _what was Satoshi like?_ Certainly not this. He had once been a braver kid, a know-it-all who wasn't afraid of trying anything, someone who knew what he wanted even if he couldn't have it. But from a point onwards, he'd stopped trying.

When Mayaka came along, he seemed to gain back a bit of his older self, but whenever things turned difficult, he'd dodge everything and everyone that had to do with it. Not even Mayaka could keep him still for too long. The worst part was, she began to blame herself.

But it wasn't like they hadn't done this to each other before; hiding, that is. The difference was, Satoshi was lagging in growing out of his insecurities worse than Mayaka was.

"You're right." Satoshi pulled me out of my thoughts with a stern voice. He huffed. "I _am_ a coward."

None of it was another of his unrequited jokes, I soon learned. Satoshi straightened his back, dug his hands inside his pockets and turned around, not showing his face.

"But if I'm going to lose her along the way, I might as well just leave. Save her some of the pain." His voice echoed in my ears. Too loudly even though he barely muttered. _"If one of the two has to give up the other, doesn't it make sense that has to be me?"_

So suddenly, a strange sensation of madness took hold of head and my actions. One second Satoshi was standing there, looking away from me, unmoving. The next, my hand had flown to his shoulder, gripping the fabric so strongly it almost tore. I turned him around in a single, hasty move and soon he was against the railing again, my hand so close to his neck that I could feel his throat contracting the moment I pulled on the scarf.

"She thinks there's something terribly _wrong_ with her." I groaned. "She's been thinking that for the past _five years_. By running away, you're just proving both of you right."

Satoshi was petrified, his eyes wide and full of tears. Maybe that was what he was trying to hide. Then, out of the blue, a different grin formed on his face as every other muscle relaxed. He grabbed my wrist with both hands, and I let go of the tension as he pushed my fist back down. My own eyes widening too at the realization.

"I even pushed you out of your center, my friend. I get it. I must be doing something seriously wrong."

I felt the boiling thoughts drop to the ground just as I drew a long breath.

I let go of him and relaxed my shoulders. "You have to understand, I didn't come here betting on you solely because you're my friend, Satoshi. I'm doing it because I hold the hope that you're much better than this."

He stared back at me, with nothing but incomprehension written all over his face, trying hard to read my expression. Nothing else was said for a short while, until he let his head drop slowly.

"I-… _I'm sorry._ "

It could have been a raindrop what hit the wooden board beneath his feet a second after. But it wasn't raining around us just yet. Another drop followed and then his shoulders started to shake silently.

I felt bad as I looked at him. Not knowing what else to do, I just patted his shoulder a few times.

"I didn't mean to do that, sorry."

Satoshi laughed as he brought the back of his hand to his cheek, wiping away every trace of tears before looking up again, a wide grin tugging at his lips.

"Sometimes I envy you, Houtarou."

I looked at him, retrieving nothing but the confusion he'd expressed earlier.

" _You're so safe, because you haven't fallen for anyone this way."_

I had nothing to reply. He was right.

"But then again, that's a pity too." Satoshi gathered up his breath to compose himself

Then he began walking ahead. When he noticed I was still on the same spot instead of following him, he looked over his shoulder.

"It'll rain soon, you know?" He grinned.

I sighed. Yes, it probably would any time soon. I matched his step and the walk back was quite silent for the most part. It brought back the old memory of doing so day by day when we were high school students.

Satoshi walked with me to the train station, though he wasn't leaving town just yet.

"I want to see my sister before she goes back to college. Then I have a few things to do in Kyoto, for a day or two. After then… I'll have my answer." He sighed but still sounded determined.

As I waited for my line, he started on another topic, now with a much more lighthearted nature in his speech.

"Man, I can't wait to see you go through heaven and hell once you find your someone." He said, a teasing smile shamelessly expressing his stance.

"Shut up." I rolled my eyes.

"Speaking of, I ran into Asami Toba the other day. Remember her?" He smirked with a raised eyebrow.

"Holy- would you just shut up?" I grunted, not too energetically.

"Aw, come on! She might still have a crush on you, and she was kind of cute. You're not getting any younger!"

I scowled at him, though I was more tired rather than actually annoyed by his teasing. It was good to see him recover a bit of mirth, even if it came with laughing at my face.

Much to my relief, the train arrived just before he kept his mouth running. Just as the doors were about to slide open, Satoshi waved his hand with a much softer expression.

"I'm really glad you're my friend, Houtarou." He smiled genuinely. "I want to be there when _it_ happens to you, just like you were here today for me."

I spared him one last look as I stepped onto the cabin, still confused as to what to respond.

"Just behave. See you." I said before the doors closed and the train started moving. Satoshi waved at me until I couldn't see him anymore.

…

For the first time in a week, it had stopped raining in Yokohama. The asphalt was still slightly damped, a few puddles remained at the edge of the road, and the grass and trees were covered by a thick layer of dew, but at least the sky was clear and I could see some stars scattered above. On this I pondered while looking up on my way back from a convenience store.

The day before I had been too dissuaded by the rain not to leave my home again after returning from Tokyo, so my plans to buy groceries were at a hold, until the next night.

" _Have you… asked him yet?"_ Chitanda inquired hesitantly after I had drifted off the conversation through the phone. Lately, I was beginning to get used to her random calls, though they weren't too common.

"Yeah. I told you it wasn't that bad. Satoshi's just away for work." I knew my answer wasn't completely true, but there was no need to bring up the whole story only to preoccupy her more. By lying a little I also recalled that she had done the same, though less severely, just a few hours prior. "Speaking of, I thought you agreed with me about not going after them."

" _Oh… How did you find out?"_ Embarrassment could be clearly heard through the speaker.

I recurred to yet another _half_ lie.

"I talked to Mayaka earlier, she picked up thinking it was you. She said she felt sorry, so whatever she told you, don't take it to heart."

" _Of course not, I understand, Maya-san is just too sweat."_ She exhaled.

"I refuse to believe we're talking about the same person." I replied sternly, though she took it humorously. She did not say anything back, so I let out another thought. "You could've avoided getting yourself hurt, you know? Whatever happened… it wasn't something neither of us could fix." I spoke carefully, trying not to sound so rough.

" _I know… but I was so worried, I couldn't sleep well last night. I did think a lot about your words, but I still couldn't leave Mayaka-san alone."_ She began, her tone a bit saddened. _"However, I was only pushing her when all she needed was some time to be alone…"_

 _« So did Satoshi; though he did need that bit of a push. »_ I thought, although Chitanda didn't need to know to which extent I had to take things in order to understand that and find some answers.

I knew she didn't mean any harm and it wasn't up to neither of us whatever happened between Mayaka and Satoshi next. So, I let go of the matter and changed to a more trivial subject.

"I tried the macaroon." She mumbled a sound of confusion before I finished. "It was really sugary, but it was good."

I walked up the stairs to my floor upon arriving at the complex.

"… _I told you, that bakery makes the sweetest treats."_ Her voice started off a bit serious, but by the end of her sentence, she giggled softly, taking off a pound of weight from her tone.

"Ah, literally…" I added, though half of my attention was now placed on the key sliding inside the slot as I opened the door to my flat, my phone clasped between my ear and shoulder.

Chitanda went completely silent while I did that the small noises must have been enough for her ear to catch and figure out what I was doing because she pointed it out once I was done placing the bags on the kitchen counter.

" _I see_ \- hear- _"_ She corrected herself. _"you are back home."_

I hummed, but she seemed thoughtful for another minute, like she wasn't sure of what to say next.

" _I didn't realize of how late it already was when I called you."_ She said in a lower voice.

I looked at the time on the screen of the phone, it was a little past nine. For some reason, I hadn't paid attention to the time earlier, and just kept on walking back home from the store with the new company of Chitanda's voice. However, perhaps Chitanda hadn't taken it so lightly as her voice became remorseful and a bit clumsy.

" _Oreki-san,"_ She began shyly. _"I know I'm always bothering you. No matter what, every time I talk to you, I just end up babbling… but you still listen."_

Feeling a strange burden, I wanted to divert her attention to something else, something less relevant, but she didn't let me and continued with her words.

" _It must be very burdensome for you. I never know when to stop talking."_ She uttered, sounding so hopeless. " _I'm sorry."_

I had recently discovered how much I disliked the weight of her apologies, because it would always hush her voice and the natural mirth it'd tend to carry.

"Listening suits me better than talking anyways." I shrugged, even though she couldn't see that. "And maybe it's my fault for not stopping you."

" _You're just too kind."_ She said. _"I promise to work on that in the future, and learn to be less selfish when I talk to you."_

 _Selfish._ Now she was just being ridiculous.

"It's no big deal." I scoffed. "Do you always apologize, even for the littlest of things?"

" _S-Should I not?"_ I could almost hear her blink.

"Well, not to me, Chitanda."

She sighed a soft chuckle. "I cannot make that promise, Oreki-san."

The conversation did not go far after that, soon it ended with Chitanda bidding goodbye and wishing me a good night's sleep. I hummed at the end and kept placing the items I'd bought into the fridge and cupboards.

…

Even if I did not know Chitanda for as long as I'd known Mayaka and Satoshi, or for as long as they'd known her, it was somewhat reassuring to know that I wasn't the only one getting a headache whenever they went through something difficult. If I lacked in being a good friend to them, which I knew I did, at least I knew now they also had Chitanda.

And I wanted to believe I did too. But the truth was, being with her never felt the way being next to Satoshi or Mayaka did. That wasn't to say that I wouldn't want to be a friend to her, if anything, I was trying hard to wrap my mind around that idea. I just couldn't, it was different, and I did not understand how so or why.

Then there was Mayaka coming up to me claiming that Chitanda trusted me to an unknown extent, which only made it all the more complex for me to grasp. I wasn't sure of how to take that responsibility onto my shoulders, but at the same time, I did not want it to go to waste.

It was funny, or maybe just absurd, to think that in the past I had drawn a line between her and me, naively believing it would be enough of a barrier between the two. But it only took a few months for her to stomp over and walk beyond it, until it became inexistent. And I would always follow, one step behind her, till I had no regrets left.

When I first saw her, I thought I would never see her again, and it didn't matter. When I met her, the same thing happened, but now the stranger was no longer nameless. When I found her, curled up in tears deep into the night, I just couldn't turn around. And as the months kept running, I was still coming back to her side.

There was no turning back, but it wasn't like I wanted to turn my back on her anyway.

…

* * *

Well, hello again! you didn't think I abandoned this story, did you?

It's been a while, but my semester is finally over ~~~

*You may notice I changed Ch6's title so Ch7's wouldn't be repetitive*

Dear graciousness this one is the longest thus far xD

Anyways, how did you like some SatoMaya? I know it's not the happiest take-on, but please bear with me a little, I've never experimented with this ship and it's sooo hard. HoutaEru is not usually this complex hahaha

It's funny 'cause in almost every fanfic, the main couple is the struggly one while the secondary couple is just happily chillin' in the background, yet here I just gave SatoMaya a hard time, sorryaboutthat

However, I'll try to work on it and give you some conclusion to this little arch later on ;)

To get some real SatoMaya feels, I'd suggest you look "mayakyaa"/"petaldancing" up on tumblr; AMAZING, my fav Hyouka _fanfictionist_ (is that the proper title? idk) btw :D

As of HoutaEru… this chapter wasn't even supposed to revolve around them! but I still snuck up a little cheesy rant at the end because I can't help myself hahaha

Sorry I keep rambling, but it's been so long I have a lot to say :)

The next chapters will hopefully move forward much faster. It just dawned on me that I've only gotten 7 chapters done in 2 years and that's, well, just lame, I apologize /.\

Something more, do you think this counts as [K+]? I'm a little afraid since I used the theme of alcohol and I will be using it again in the future so Idk if I should change it to [T]… that's as far as this story gets on that regard, but idk how strict FF can get :/ let me know if you've more experience with these guidelines :)

Thank you, as always, for following the story, means the world! Leave a review if you'd like, I always enjoy knowing what you think *hearts*

See you very soon! :)))


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